Very British problems: moving house

Our nearest neighbours’ dearest foibles are laid bare

Very British problems: having to take responsibility and apologise to the movers for the laws of physics. Photograph: Getty Images

Very British problems: having to take responsibility and apologise to the movers for the laws of physics. Photograph: Getty Images

 

Being loath to get rid of any clothes despite the chances of you fitting in them again being dependent on time travel.

Wondering why you decided that ‘house stuff’ would be a helpful thing to label 17 boxes.

Taking a box from the attic in your old house to the attic in your new house.

Spending four hours online choosing a toaster to go in the flat you chose after four minutes of viewing.

Questioning your packing ability when you notice that one huge box only contains half a bottle of ketchup, a Rubik’s cube and a handful of old birthday cards.

Finding it quite uncomfortable when you, your partner and the estate agent are all in the bathroom taking it in turns to say ‘Excellent’.

Having to take responsibility and apologise to the movers for the laws of physics.

Knowing the moving process is only truly over when you thoroughly resent every single thing you own.

Very British Problems: Volume Three by Rob Temple is published in paperback by Sphere, £7.99, out now

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