THE Hong Kong handover reminds one Irish businessmen of an episode in the colony some years ago. He was keen to do business on the mainland but needed an introduction from a well-connected local.his years of cultivation of the Chinese, even to the point of learning Cantonese.

The businessman took his new friend to dinner at the renowned Chinese restaurant of the Regent Hotel. The menus were presented in Cantonese only. The ex-pat, who's command of Cantonese was considerably less than he claimed, had no choice but to bluff. "I'll have number X," he told the waiter. The waiter replied: "no you won't". The ex-pat was indignant: "What do you mean I can't have number X?". The waiter said: "Because what you are calling Number X is the orchestra".