There was a major security breach last Saturday when a foxy redhead with a passion for politics slipped into Government Buildings. The intruder gained entry just before lunchtime, when tours of the building were in full swing.
“We believe he was sniffing around the European division, the protocol division and the press centre, and he certainly visited the water cooler, but he didn’t breach the Cabinet suite,” a spokesman tells us. The fox was eventually spotted on CCTV by the Army, but he gave soldiers the slip. Having spent about two hours wandering the corridors of power, he made good his escape through the window of the Attorney General’s office. Acting on legal advice, clearly. “The stench was ferocious when we came in on Monday,” says a staffer. “We had to get industrial cleaners in. It’s a good job there were no visiting heads of state around.”
It’s seems that Reynard the fox is a regular visitor to the environs of Government Buildings, but he has never before managed to get inside. Since his incursion on Saturday the two ducks that had been visiting the fountain regularly haven’t been seen. This might – or might not – be because they don’t like it when the water jets are turned back on. They have been known to leave in a huff when that happens.
“The smell got worse again during the week,” says the staffer. “Some people are afraid to go to the basement in case it’s full of dead ducks and bones. They think they’re in a Stephen King novel.”
