‘I’ve had girlfriends and been emotionally attached but I don’t want to have sex’

Tell Me About It: I am a 24-year-old male and I have never been physically attracted to anyone, either male or female

“Finding a life partner is no small task and it requires us to open up our inner selves to another human being.” Photograph: iStock

“Finding a life partner is no small task and it requires us to open up our inner selves to another human being.” Photograph: iStock

Question: I am really worried about my sexuality. It is something I have always found very hard to explain to myself and this letter is the first time I have ever openly discussed this issue with anyone else. But I don’t know who to discuss it with or how to even go about talking about it.

Basically, I am a 24-year-old male and I have had a few short-lived relationships with girls my own age. But I have never been physically attracted to any of them. I have actually never really been physically attracted to anyone, either male or female. I can, of course, appreciate that someone is attractive – I just never feel physically drawn towards them. I am, perhaps surprisingly, not a virgin and I can get an erection when physically stimulated, but I have never enjoyed sex and just find it to be a laborious task.

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