FAI have a licence to spread confusion

On Soccer: In his stand-up comedy days Robin Williams had a gag the gist of which was that while American cops had something to bargain with when they shouted at a fleeing villain, "Stop or I'll shoot", the worst threat their unarmed British counterparts could unleash in similar circumstances was, "Stop or . . . er, I'll shout stop again." A couple of decades on that looks set to become the official FAI policy on the policing of its once revered club-licensing scheme.

Last year, of course, things didn't quite go to plan and the association pretty much had to bin the main thrust of the scheme in order to preserve the National League's two-division structure.

Despite assurances that the climbdown was strictly a one-off there was always a strong suspicion that things would be little better 12 months on. Sure enough, the new guidelines due to be received by clubs over the next day or so are reported to have abandoned any attempt to enforce the infrastructural element of the scheme's requirements, with clubs being told instead that they need to come up with what one club official said yesterday is a "three- to five-year plan" for the implementation of what was initially required (no exceptions mind) roughly a year ago.

One can only imagine the horrors that await clubs that fail to fulfil their commitments under the terms of this plan.

There is some debate behind the scenes about whether the correct procedures have been followed as a key element of the scheme has effectively been put back to where it was four to six years ago.

It is hard to ascertain precisely what has gone on because FAI chief executive Fran Rooney was not contactable yesterday, and nobody but the chief executive is allowed to speak publicly on this or just about anything else.

Moreover, the members of the First Instance Committee, the body which is supposed to be responsible for the whole thing, are, on the one hand, bound by a confidentiality clause and, on the other, in the dark, it seems, as to what exactly is going on.

What appears to be the case, though, is the body which is supposed to take ultimate responsibility for the licensing manual and its implementation is, having not met since June, to be asked to consider this year's watered-down document only after UEFA have approved its contents and a matter of weeks before the deadline for completed applications to be returned by the clubs.

Still, it almost seems like quibbling to get into how the decision was arrived at and when, or even if, it might be rubber-stamped. The net effect is that last year's prolonged wrangling over the granting of A licences now looks, more than ever, like a complete waste of everybody's time.

This is, generally speaking, good news for the three clubs promoted from Division One, for Finn Harps, UCD and either Bray Wanderers or Kildare Town would all fall well short of the requirements laid out in last year's document when the new season starts in March. All, needless to say, reckon they can be sitting pretty in three to five years.

It is also, on the face of it, bad news for Dublin City who, as the team currently in line to be relegated, will be deprived of the potential lifeline they would be their own A licence, which they would have been able to argue entitled them to retain their top-flight status unless there was a similarly qualified club to replace them.

Buoyed by his side's fine fightback against Derry at the weekend, however, Ronan Seery remained determined yesterday that City would stay up by overhauling Shamrock Rovers in the table and insisted that if they failed to do so then they would make no attempt to challenge their relegation on the basis of licensing.

Shamrock Rovers directors may be less dignified about the situation if they end up being overtaken by City although it would be bizarre, to say the least, if a club with no ground and endless financial problems saved itself from relegation on the basis of having an A licence. Another first division club, however, (most likely Galway United) could still mount a close-season push for promotion on the basis of a favourable ground inspection.

Then there is the likelihood of strife over Government funding with only a fraction of the €3 million that was to be provided to clubs for licensing-related ground improvements in 2004 expected to be drawn down, and nothing like what is required to adequately address the overall situation being made available by Government officials who are reportedly bemused that clubs could be capable of reaching the standards required of them before they get the cash earmarked for just that purpose.

Asked yesterday for his interpretation of this latest turn of events in the licensing saga, one member of the First Instance Committee declined to comment. "It might," he suggested, however, "be a sign of a deeper malaise."

He might, you could be forgiven for thinking, be on to something.