‘All I want is a shower’ after listening to a day’s vitriol in family court – judge

Judge advises couple to reach agreement through a mediator

‘There is business you will have to do until you are buried and that is dealing with your children,’ judge warnds couple. Photograph: Alan Betson / THE IRISH TIMES

‘There is business you will have to do until you are buried and that is dealing with your children,’ judge warnds couple. Photograph: Alan Betson / THE IRISH TIMES

 

A judge has stated that all he wants to do at the end of a day at the family law court is to have a shower after listening to vitriol and bitterness from people before the court.

At the Family Law Court in Ennis, Judge Patrick Durcan made his comment when urging a couple to go to mediation rather than “do battle” in open court.

Judge Durcan told the couple to go to mediation “for the sake of your children. It is important that they are not going to be damaged or damaged as little as possible”.

“No matter how much you hate one another or don’t hate one another, you are always going to be bound together by your two young children,” he said.

He added, “I am getting tired of coming in here and when I finish in this court, all I want is a shower because of the vitriol and bitterness that is thrown out here.”

The judge advised the couple to reach agreement through a Courts Service mediator, as they and their children would be the ones to lose out if they don’t.

“Otherwise, you will become ugly, nasty, gnarled, bitter, embittered people,” he warned.

Judge Durcan said that the couple’s son could hurl for Clare and the father replied, “Hopefully”. The judge added: “If he does, the youngster wants the two of ye supporting him together, not on either side of the pitch shouting abuse at one another or giving daggers looks to one another”.

Judge Durcan said that the couple’s daughter, if she was performing in a school play wouldn’t want the sight of them on opposite sides of the school. “There is business you will have to do until you are buried and that is dealing with your children. You have to regulate your future,” he said.

Judge Durcan adjourned the case to October 4th after the couple agreed to go to a mediator.

During the court sitting, Judge Durcan granted six safety order applications and one barring order application to women.

In one case, Judge Durcan granted a safety order for three years to a woman who was living in fear of her alcoholic daughter.

Judge Durcan also granted a two-year safety order to a woman after her partner threatened to kill her, while he granted a safety order on consent in another case to a woman where her ex-partner was harassing her by text and intimidating her.