How agreeable are you?
My role as a Church of Ireland clergyman is profoundly relational. I work with a huge amount of committed volunteers and with people when they’re sick and struggling. They are agreeable with me, so I hope I’m agreeable with them. My role couldn’t function if I were either a people pleaser or inflexible.
What’s your middle name and what do you think of it?
I have two middle names, Richard and George. George is my maternal grandfather’s first name and also my paternal grandfather’s first name. Richard is a family name that stretches back to the last Church of Ireland archbishop Richard Lawrence, of whom I’m descended. However, I was specifically named after my half-uncle, Maj Richard McKinley, who died in Monte Casino on March 16th, 1944, aged 25, fighting for the 16th Punjabi Division of the Indian army. No one ever calls me Richard or George.
Where was your favourite place in Ireland?
Skellig Michael, Co Kerry. It’s beyond words, a place of mesmerising solitude and contemplation. I have only visited once, but it left a profound impression. Just before I was to be ordained as a priest, I made inquiries to request that I stay overnight, alone in a beehive cell, to prepare myself for what lay ahead. I wasn’t successful in my application, but if an opportunity did arise, I would love to stay there just one night. Although preferably not in winter.
Describe yourself in three words
I asked my four children if I was cool or silly. In roaring unison, they replied that I was silly. My six-year-old daughter added that, even though I’m only 44, I was also old and rusty. There you have it: Silly. Old. Rusty.
When did you last get angry?
I don’t think I get angry too often. I am passionate about things, and this can lead to disappointments and frustrations.
What have you lost that you would like to have back?
It’s not a personal loss. I’m based in St Bridget’s Cathedral in Kildare. In 1185, a famous Welsh historian named Gerald Wales came to the monastery and read from a spectacular copy of the Gospels, which was produced in the scriptorium of the Kildare monastery. Gerald said the book was so beautiful it must have been the work, not of men, but of angels. Scholars agree there was once a Book of Kildare, which they say was on a par with the Book of Kells. I would love a geophysical survey or an archaeological dig to uncover this spectacular manuscript again.
What’s your strongest childhood memory?
Probably experiences with my grandparents, like eating exquisitely delicious tomatoes from my grandfather’s greenhouse, tasting sherry that my grandmother would let me have a sip of, or bathing in my other grandmother’s pine-flavoured Radox bubble bath with bubbles up to the brim.
Where do you come in your family’s birth order and has this defined you?
I was the youngest for 8½ years, and then my throne was usurped by my younger brother, Ian. He went on to play international rugby for Italy – with one eye, I might add – so he has definitely overshadowed me!
[ Photographer John Minihan: ‘I’ve seen a lot of heartache in my life but I’ve never been unhappy’ ]
What do you expect to happen when you die?
I believe that after the death of my body, I will face God’s judgment. This might sound scary, but it’s also deeply reassuring, as there will be ultimate justice for those who exercised good in life and those who did not. I also believe there is eternal life after physical, earthly life.
When were you happiest?
A richer term for me is when you are at peace. Life can be full of these moments, from spectacular examples such as my wedding day, my beautiful wife, Julie, or the birth of my four children, or simple moments like having a fresh coffee on a Monday morning. The 17th-century French mathematician and philosopher Blaise Pascal famously said that all the world’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit still in a room.
Which actor would play you in a biopic about your life?
Although we’re not the same age, I admire the actor Gabriel Byrne. He trained to be a priest for five years, so he might have some sympathies for the role.
What is your biggest career/personal regret?
It’s difficult within my current work to do personal projects because I am committed to serving, but I love to compose music. I’ve written hundreds of songs, but I’ve never adequately carved out space to record and perform my music.
Have you any psychological quirks?
When I was training for ordination, I undertook some psychological and personality tests. One test revealed that I was a very high activist and a very low contemplative. My lecturer told me that I needed to, and I quote, “Protest less and pray more”. I’m working on that.
In conversation with Tony Clayton-Lea
