MAGAN'S WORLD: Manch án Magan's tales of a travel addict
WHO'LL JOIN ME on a trip to Congo? I'm serious: I want to organise a holiday, to reclaim this beleaguered place from the grips of the pessimists and cynical African doomsayers.
The Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) has been abused for too long - by HM Stanley, King Leopold II of Belgium, slave traders, rubber barons and the dictator Mobutu Sese Seko, among others.
In 2006 the Congolese finally managed to hold the first democratic elections in the country's history, and what has our main response been? Not to set up cultural links or start arranging holidays but to rush to the bookshops to buy the latest patronising, self-serving account of the darkness and depravity of the place.
Tim Butcher's Blood River, an account of the author's journey through the Congo, has been on the bestseller lists for months. From the moment I heard it was written by a Daily Telegraph correspondent I was wary. This was the newspaper, after all, that funded Stanley's journey there, 130 years ago, and first popularised the notion of deepest, darkest Africa.
Butcher's book is a gripping read, but at significant points, in my opinion, he heavily overemphasises the desolation and the dangers he encounters for the sake of his story. It is exactly what Stanley did in his accounts, giving the reader a riveting, sensationalistic read but providing an unfair impression about just how bad things are there.
So what can we do about it? I'm suggesting we take a bold step and swap our usual summer holiday in Tuscany or Torremolinos for two weeks in Congo - just to show the small-minded naysayers that it can be done. I'm not saying it will be easy, or even completely safe - and I should stress that this august publication is not backing my proposal in any way (and that nor, most probably, will your insurance company) - but how else can we begin to turn people's perspectives on the heart of Africa around?
We will probably be robbed, and it's inevitable that we will be asked for bribes and will have to face significant delays occasionally, but these will be as nothing compared to the welcome we will receive from the people and to the beauty of the landscape.
It is 18 years since I have been to the DRC (it was still Zaire at the time), but in all my travels since I haven't encountered anything to compare. I'll never forget my first sight of the jungle stretching out towards the equator: the bottle-thick vines, sepulchral trees, cathedralesque canopies and coiling waterways, the very energy centre from which all human life emerged.
As the roads have mostly been wiped out, it's probably best that we stick to the river on this trip - maybe fly into Kinshasa and take a boat or a local flight upriver to Kisangani (formerly Stanleyville). We'll rent some pirogues, or dugout canoes, there and take to the water - the Congo River - this strip of sliver-blue ribbon that flows through swathes of undulant greenness.
At the risk of the odd water-borne disease, we can ask the helmsman to steer us out into mid-river, away from the crocodiles and hippos that congregate along the banks, and go for a swim. It's an unforgettable experience to become part of this great mass of water, the same river that brought slaves to the coast, as it did gold, ivory, Kalashnikovs and mahogany. This "immense snake uncoiled", as Conrad described it.
Perhaps we'll visit some pygmy villages, and how about staying in a crumbling colonial mansion slowly rotting in the jungle? Maybe a side trip, too, to see where the Irish UN forces made their heroic stand against the Balubas in 1961. Are you with me or what?
manchan@ireland.com