To Be Honest: A mother responds to a complaint about breastfeeding educators

I have been a mother for almost eight years and I have yet to meet a member of the so-called “breastapo” described in a recent To Be Honest column on the Education pages. What I have seen in every parenting magazine, ad, parenting website and even in birth packs in maternity hospitals, is sponsorship from formula companies. Unlike breastfeeding, formula is a multimillion euro business; they can afford the widespread marketing.

The only aspect of my parenting choices I have ever been judged on is breastfeeding: “Are you still breastfeeding?”, “Are you going to still feed that child when she is in school?”, and “I can’t believe you are feeding him, he has teeth.” In my experience, it’s perfectly acceptable to run down breastfeeding if you choose to bottle feed. I would never dream of telling a friend the reason their child has colic is most likely due to formula or that they would have lost their excess pregnancy weight quicker had they breastfed. I could possibly lose that friendship if I uttered such comments but negative comments on breastfeeding are fair game.

I often wonder why Ireland’s breastfeeding rates are so low. Only a tiny percentage of women cannot breastfeed; the majority, who don’t breastfeed, choose not to do so or run into problems and give up. Why do we have the lowest breastfeeding rates in the EU? Could the fact we are obsessed with alcohol be hindering our breastfeeding rates? When I was pregnant I was continually asked if I missed alcohol, or after the birth, had I had a drink yet. Are mothers elsewhere asked this? Or is it purely down to lack of education?

My first breastfeeding experience was plagued with bad medical advice and poor health education, and I had no practical support from someone who had breastfed. For some women, breastfeeding comes naturally, but for others, like myself, it is a learned skill. In our overcrowded, under-resourced health service, advice and support is not always there, but there are breastfeeding groups in every area, and online. You need to look for advice if you need it. I didn’t know this with my first child but I educated myself before my second child was born.

What is missing educationally is peer support. In my circle of friends, formula feeding is the norm. I had to seek out breastfeeding advice. I was a source of advice for my sister when she had her first child, which helped her. Support is missing and I believe that’s why we have low breastfeeding rates.

Nobody would argue with the fact that breastfeeding is best for babies and mothers, but what is not widely known is that it is hugely enjoyable. Women need to learn that breastfeeding does not stop you working, socialising, sleeping or even drinking. It enhances your life, rather than hindering it. Some will deem me a "smug, patronising earth mother", and while I'm optimistic that by the time my babies have babies our breastfeeding rates will have increased, we still have a long way to go.

This column gives a voice to people concerned about education. Contributions welcome to education@irishtimes.com