Not eating was `my way of rebelling'

"I BECAME anorexic when I was 12 years old. I'm 35 now and little was known about it then

"I BECAME anorexic when I was 12 years old. I'm 35 now and little was known about it then. At the time I did athletics and was under a lot of pressure from my parents and coaches. Even though it was not what I wanted to do I was not inclined to argue. I just wanted to please people," says Tiggy Hudson, who now weighs 7 1/2 stone.

"The only way out to get some control of the situation was to starve myself. I got hypothermia twice and I decided it was a good way out of training. I got a string of illnesses afterwards and I claimed that I couldn't eat. After a few months I was four stone. I went into St Vincent's Hospital and they force-fed me until I was seven stone. There was no point in that. My only aim when I came out was to lose it again. I felt I was a freak.

"Friends of my parents would tell them to just put a meal in front of me and make me eat. They Just didn't understand. Some teenagers rebel by drinking and staying out late. I was very good as a child and this was my way of rebelling. I went to a psychiatrist who put me on pills but that was useless. When I was 17 or 18 my whole family went to therapy and that helped my parents realise how to understand me and my anorexia.

"Food is just the weapon really, and it wasn't until I was 27 and I moved out from my parents that I began to get it together. When I was about 32 I made a conscious decision to do something about it. I went through hell because so many things came up but my mother was a great support. It took me about two hours to get through each meal.

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"I am fine now as long as I don't get into a relationship where someone is telling me what to do. The odd thing will upset me. I hate it when someone knocks on the door when I am sitting down to a meal. One of the best things is that I have just had a baby. The doctors said I never would because I did not have a period from the age of 13 to 32 and have osteoporosis as a result. It is a pity there was no helpline when I was younger. It could have saved a lot of pain."