Lives Lost to Covid-19: John McConnell – ‘Part of me died that day when he died’

This article is one of a series about people who have died with coronavirus in Ireland and among the diaspora. You can read more of them here. If you would like a friend or family member included in the series, please email liveslost@irishtimes.com

John McConnell 1944-2021

John McConnell was a friendly, sociable and hardworking man who loved his local Rathfarnham community and brought joy into the lives of his children and grandchildren.

Born on November 9th, 1944, John was brought up by his grandparents who lived in the Mount Pleasant Buildings in Ranelagh after his mother died when he was two years old. His two brothers and sister were moved into children's homes but the four siblings became close again as adults.

He met his wife, Rose Downes, at a dance in Ranelagh when he was 18 and she was just 14 years old. "She was a wild thing, me Ma," remembers their daughter Mary. "She was always climbing out the window to go meet him." The couple were married in 1969 in the Church of Mary Immaculate, Refuge of Sinners, on the Rathmines Road, recognisable across the Dublin skyline for its large copper dome. Mary's brother was born shortly after the couple were married and she arrived a year later.

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John worked as a clothing presser until he moved into a job with Quinnsworth in Rathfarnham. Mary remembers how her dad would bring her along to the pub on a Sunday afternoon and sit her at the bar with a lemonade and a pack of crisps. “That was my treat with him.”

People just can't believe he's gone, they're all heartbroken

Life became extremely difficult for the family when Mary’s youngest sister died aged four from meningitis. “My mum’s father had died just three months before and my mum was in hospital when her daughter died. Dad was great, he’d go to work in Quinnsworth at 6am and then come home later to make us dinner.”

John loved his job in Quinnsworth, which later became a Tesco, and regretted taking early retirement when the company offered him a good package to finish up. "He missed it terribly, he worked there for 35 years. Up to the week before he died he kept going up to Tesco every Friday and walk around chatting to everyone. He loved it there."

John also worked one day a week as a window cleaner in Rathfarnham village, another job he really enjoyed. “He’d talk to anyone,” says Mary. “It would be a half-hour job and it would take him three hours because he was talking so much. But that was his life and he loved it.”

John was a big Manchester United fan, loved playing pitch and putt with his son and "idolised" his two granddaughters. Mary would bring her dad to "gadget shops" on her days off where he loved browsing for clocks. He always picked up a pack of lighters for Rose on their shopping days.

John's granddaughters taught him to use Zoom during the pandemic so they could chat most nights. "He got the Disney channel so he could watch movies with them. But he hated lockdown and not being able to see us."

In early January John tested positive for Covid-19 but didn’t feel sick until the second week of his quarantine period. He started showing symptoms on the Monday and was brought to hospital by ambulance on Wednesday.

Part of me died that day when he died. I really miss him

Two days later, on Friday, January 15th, Mary’s brother called advising that she make her way to the hospital. The rest of the family, including Rose, could not visit as they had tested positive for Covid-19.

“When I got to his bedside, the nurse said ‘Your daughter’s here,’ and he opened his eyes. I was only home from the hospital later that day when they rang to tell me. They reckon he waited for me to come and then left us.”

John’s funeral was held on February 3rd with 10 people in attendance. The local Rathfarnham community was “devastated” by his death, says Mary. “People just can’t believe he’s gone, they’re all heartbroken. Customers who knew him for years have been buying me flowers saying how sorry they are.”

Mary says her mother has struggled since her father’s death and relied on him for most of the cooking, washing and jobs around the house. “He was the head of the family, we really realise that now and we’re lost without him. He gave my kids so much joy. Part of me died that day when he died. I really miss him.”