Eleven ways to dispose of a cool £7m or so

1. Buy a new job. Hell! Forget the job and buy the company.

1. Buy a new job. Hell! Forget the job and buy the company.

2. Forget work altogether and live off the interest - around £1,055 a day.

3. Buy Ayesha Castle in Killiney for £2.5 million and look down on Gavin O'Reilly slumming it in £1.95 million Bartra.

4. Live in posh penury in a 16th century Venetian palazzo - one of the best is for sale at the moment, Palazzo Giovanni Dario. Offers, to UK agents Debenham Thorpe, around $10 million (that would leave you with £750,000 for carpets and curtains).

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5. Buy an atoll in the South Pacific, not too near the radiation belt.

6. Buy the ultimate car: the Jaguar XL220. It goes like a rocket and does everything. The cost? £450,000 (small change to you).

7. Start thinking protection - you're now worth kidnapping. A full time 24 hour bodyguard will cost up to £750 a week and you better get some cover from Lloyds as well. Minimum cover for only around £3,500 a week. 8. Discover a really good champagne and stick to it. We recommend Dom Perignon 1985 vintage - £75 a bottle.

9. Book into the best hotel in the world, the Amankila in Bali, but only if you can get the pavilion suite, with a full staff and a black granite swimming pool. It takes under 60 seconds for any request to be fulfilled, according to Tatler magazine, which voted it hotel of the year. The bill? £765 a night.

10. Now that you're used to such pampering, hire a full staff when you come home. You'll need a trained butler (£25,000 p.a.); cook (ditto); nanny (£15,000); au pair (£3,000); a rota of cleaners at £5 an hour. Gardener. Masseuse. Dog walker. The usual.

11. Build a new house to accommodate them all. Annoy everyone by installing a payphone.

Orna Mulcahy

Orna Mulcahy

Orna Mulcahy, a former Irish Times journalist, was Home & Design, Magazine and property editor, among other roles