If timing is everything, no wonder the flight attendant's joke went down like a lead balloon as Liverpool left John Lennon International airport yesterday.
"We appear to be one person short on the passenger list," said the French stewardess. "Mr Fowler, please make yourself known to the crew."
Players and management sat stony-faced at the front of the plane, ignoring the tumbleweed drifting down the aisle.
"That was a real rib-tickler," muttered one official. "Even the jet engines went quiet."
Liverpool were not in the mood. Besides a potentially pivotal Champions League tie against the powerful Italians Roma, Gerard Houllier's absence as he recovers from heart surgery and with Robbie Fowler sold to Leeds, the caretaker manager Phil Thompson had more bad news to gauge.
Markus Babbel, his former German international defender who has not played since August after contracting a virus, has now been diagnosed as suffering from Guillan-Barre Syndrome.
The condition attacks the nervous system; its most debilitating strain, which moves up the body into the respiratory system, is life threatening.
Having identified the problem at an early stage, Liverpool are confident that danger will be averted. Babbel, (29), was signed from Bayern Munich under the Bosman ruling 18 months ago and played an integral part in last term's treble cup success, scoring in the UEFA Cup final in Dortmund.
He is currently in hospital in Germany and, though his club remain publicly optimistic that he may yet play some part this season, realistically his career must be under considerable threat.
"He's had a reaction to the original virus and has gone back to Germany for treatment," said Thompson. "For the moment, we've been told he'll be out for another three months. It's a big blow for Markus and the team. At least it has been diagnosed."
The news overshadowed preparations for this evening's mouth-watering tie which, if Liverpool are to remain in touch with the top of the group, the visitors can hardly afford to lose.
Rather than wallow on the shortcomings exposed by Barcelona a fortnight ago, they will be heartened by memories of last season's UEFA Cup triumph against this opposition.
"Home and away Roma were fantastic against us," said Thompson. "We beat the best team in the competition. As it is, I'm looking forward to testing myself against Fabio Capello."
Capello appeared less enamoured by the prospect, dismissing Liverpool as "only capable of playing one way", though that was good enough last year.
His side have been eliminated from European competition by English clubs in the last two years, with Michael Owen's brace proving decisive in the UEFA Cup last season.
Liverpool eventually progressed 2-1 on aggregate against the team Thompson insists was "the best we played, in either the Premiership or Europe".
ROMA (4-4-2; probable): Antonioli; Candela, Aldair, Samuel, Zago; Tommasi, Fuser, Emerson, Assuncao; Totti, Batistuta.
LIVERPOOL (4-4-2; probable): Dudek; Carragher, Hyypia, Henchoz, Riise; Gerrard, Murphy, Hamann, Smicer; Owen, Heskey.
Referee: D Jol (Holland).
