MAGPIE:FORGET THE Oscars. The publishing world is getting into a tizzy of expectation over the soon-to-be- announced 2009 Diagram Prize.
Run by Horace Bent of thebookseller.com, the Diagram is awarded annually for the oddest book titles of the previous year.
Bent is limbering up for his shortlist. Current front-runners include: Advances in Potato Chemistry and Technology, Collectible Spoons of the Third Reichand An Intellectual History of Cannibalism. These are just three of the 90 titles submitted, which have been whittled down to a more manageable 49.
They include: The Master Cheesemakers of Wisconsin, Dental Management of Sleep Disordersand Mickey Mouse, Hitler and Nazi Germany(a long-overdue study, I'm sure you'll agree). The medical world always manages a few memorable titles – the current crop includes The Changing World of Inflammatory Bowel Diseaseand Curbside Consultation in Cornea and External Disease(an "eye- poppingly good companion" to last year's Curbside Consultation of the Colon,as Bent puts it).
The jury is out as to whether the shortlist (due on February 19th) will include The Origin of Faeces, Peek-a-poo: What’s in Your Diaper? and (a personal favourite) Is the Rectum a Grave?.
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AN INDONESIAN man has lost six teeth because the cigarette he was smoking exploded in his mouth. Security guard Andi Susanto (31) said PT Nojorono Tobacco Indonesia, the maker of the cigarette he was smoking, had offered to pay for his medical treatment, which reportedly cost five million rupiah (about €380).
Speaking to the media through bandaged lips, Mr Susanto said: “The company’s officials have talked to my family and we agreed to settle it amicably, as an out-of-court settlement. They will pay all the medical expenses.”
The cause of the explosion remains unknown.
Mr Susanto told the Jakarta Posthe was going to quit smoking.
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A PHEASANT has been accused of terrorising a north Yorkshire village by trapping people in their homes and attacking them in the street. Men, women, children, prams, bikes, dogs and cars in Newsham, near Richmond, are said to have have fallen foul of the bird.
Sonia Hall was attacked by the creature while she was out for a walk with her 2½-year-old grandson, Jacob. Her son Charles Hall (34), who runs a local hotel, said: “She was really shaken up by it. She tried to beat it off with her handbag but from what she said it is quite vicious.”
Ms Hall’s partner, Robin Leonard, a retired glass fitter, said: “The pheasant’s attack left her with a scar on her leg. The postman was passing by and saw the attack so ran over to help. The postman is scared to come into the village now in case the pheasant attacks him.”
Bob De’Ath, chairman of Newsham Parish Council, said: “Although it seems humorous, there is a serious concern that this pheasant could injure young children if it goes for their face. It is terrorising the whole village.”
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AND FINALLY, the Daily Express, which peddles just about every conspiracy story under the sun regarding the death of Princess Diana, is foaming at the mouth over "a sick prankster [who] has set up a social networking website" about her.
The macabre Twitter page (http://twitter.com/DianaInHeaven) pretends the messages come from heaven. One says: “I can’t talk about Dodi [Al Fayed] for legal reasons.”
The fake Diana, says the Express(fake? like, how would they know?), criticises the small numbers turning up at her memorial fountain in London, claiming nobody realises it was filled with the Queen Mother's gin. Referring to the site of her fatal car crash, she says: "Now looking down at Pont de l'Alma tunnel. Bigger turnout than at memorial fountain."
Alan Berry, co-founder of the Diana Appreciation Society, urged Twitter to ban the page.
“It’s sick that some people can pretend to be Diana,” he said. “What respect is that showing?”