Seated in a somewhat crowded tram-car the other day, and watching the reactions of its occupants to newcomers - as well as the truculent attitude adopted by some of those newcomers towards anyone who seemed to be taking up too much room - I was reminded once again of "The Jarvey's" instructions on "How to enjoy a tramcar." These instructions were given more than fifty years ago, but they still seem topical.
"Rule One - On getting into a tram-car care nothing for the toes or the knees of the passengers.
Rule Two - Seat yourself with a jerk, pushing at the same time against your neighbour on either side; you will thus get enough room. (The 'seating oneself with a jerk' cannot always be blamed upon the newcomer.)
"Rule Three - If possible, enter with a stick or umbrella pointed at full length, so that any sudden movement of the car may thrust it into someone's waistcoat. This will make you feared.
"Rule Four -When seated, occupy, if possible, the room of two, and throw every opposition in the way of all newcomers."
Fifty years may seem along time, but these ironical instructions are not quite out of date, after all.
The Irish Times, February 11th, 1939.