Mutual support: but without all the navel-gazing

Warmth, love and care are the words Sr Bernadette Joyce uses repeatedly in describing what she has found at LARCC to help her…

Warmth, love and care are the words Sr Bernadette Joyce uses repeatedly in describing what she has found at LARCC to help her cope with cancer. She came to the centre through the local cancer support group.

The disease disrupted her whole life, put an end to the work she had been doing for decades as a Presentation sister in Chile helping women establish and run community projects. "Your whole world is turned upside down, all your plans topple over," she says.

Within weeks of being diagnosed with breast cancer in Chile, she returned to Ireland and had surgery. She says nothing could have prepared her for "the psychological trauma of having lost an important part of my body - I couldn't even bear to look at the wound for a long time."

She says she even found it difficult to look at magazine photographs of models displaying their breasts.

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"Not that I'd ever have been showing mine off," she laughs, "but I found it distressing to look at those pictures. You feel inadequate as a woman," she says.

Some seven months after her surgery she went back to Chile to try to resume her life and work. But she found it impossible, as she was suffering from chronic fatigue.

Tears come into her eyes as she recalls realising that she wasn't able for the work. "I had given all my life for it, but I wasn't able to tune in any more.

"I had been known as a bright, energetic person, but suddenly I had no energy to give any more. I knew I had nothing to give."

She says that while she had been giving advice to people all her life, it was very difficult to apply it when it came to her own situation. She feared the disease would strike again. "Fear was clouding over me a lot. When I used to close the shutters at night, I used to get so afraid."

Helping people deal with such fear is an important part of LARCC's work and central to its philosophy is that "the more love, kindness, caring and understanding we receive and give, the less opportunity there is for fear to overcome us".

She says she was someone who thought that a cancer support group would be depressing. "But in fact, it's almost unreal how positive it is."

She says that providing mutual support does not mean "navel-gazing" - the group believes in getting out and doing things - taking day trips, choral singing and fundraising for the centre. She says that what's different about talking to people at LARCC is that "you can leave your mask at the door", adding: "If you can talk to someone who knows about it, it's great."

The experience of having had cancer is now a part of her and one result is that she never takes life for granted. "I feel so grateful for life now."