Let children know they are loved regardless of results

TIPS FOR PARENTS: How can parents help their children prepare for exams. And how can students do themselves justice? Brian Mooney offer some practical tips.

One of the main causes of stress to students taking examinations is the belief that they are being judged by the degree of success or failure they achieve.

This puts enormous pressure on students and leads to many of them being prescribed tranquillisers to help them cope.

One expert tells the story of a mother who rang him about her daughter who had always been a grade A student. She had fallen apart and taken to the bed, unable to continue her studies.

His concern was in helping the girl recover full health and confidence. The woman's concern seemed to be focused on how soon he could get her daughter back to her successful academic ways. Sometimes in the rough and tumble of life we lose sight of what really matters. The most important thing every student needs to know is that they are loved and cared for, and not just because they are going to achieve any particular result.

In our desire to see our children succeed and in the way we visualise for them, we sometimes put unbearable pressures on them. They do not need to know how much you have forgone to pay for their education; you chose to make that commitment out of love and concern.

To place an onus of responsibility on their young shoulders to justify that investment is incredibly stressful to the student. The greatest gift a parent can give their son or daughter today, prior to the start of exams tomorrow, is to assure them that all you want from them is that they give of their best. Nothing more should be expected or demanded.

Some parents and students see the Leaving Certificate as a make-or-break examination, which will determine the rest of a student's life. Nothing could be further from the truth.

The Leaving Certificate is but a gateway into a myriad of career and college course choices, that of themselves open up endless possibilities. Students aiming for a sought-after degree course may be crushed to discover in August that they have not secured sufficient points, only to discover that having successfully completed the Cert/Diploma course they are offered, they can proceed to enter the final two years of their original degree choice.

Such endings do not always occur. Some students, having failed in their original objective, find they have to take an unplanned path. The nature of our modern economy is such that these paths lead very quickly to new choices and options, which will enable the person to develop their career in new directions unimaginable to them today.

The message to all parents today is to support and encourage them. Neither you nor they have any idea what life holds in store for them.

One thing is certain; they must ultimately determine the shape of their own future. You cannot relive yours through them, no matter how much you may be tempted to do so.

Parents can assist students in achieving the best result possible by supporting and encouraging them in the weeks ahead.

12 steps to exam success

(1) Know the schedule and be in time for each exam.

(2) Ensure that there is as much calm as possible around the house. Students need to renew the batteries very quickly after each day's papers.

(3) A parent's most important role is to be a listener. Avoid post mortems on papers. They achieve nothing, other than to create frustration. Students should be encouraged to tell you the story of their day. This will help them move on to the following day's exam.

(4) It can be useful to review the papers immediately ahead. Simple questions such as (a) What's up next? (b) Are there any compulsory sections? (c) Are there any predictable questions that are intrinsic to the structure of the paper? can be very useful in helping a student refocus on the evening's study ahead.

(5) Without being overbearing, parents can ensure that students maintain a proper balance between study and rest.

Remember that what is most effective is a three to four hour session, in which notes on exam questions are reviewed, followed by a one-hour break. It is often better to spend an hour in the early morning reviewing the coming day's papers rather than studying late into the previous night.

(6) Nutrition and exercise are vital. At times of stress it is very tempting to indulge in junk food. Avoid this as much as possible by ensuring regular light meals are available.

(7) Peer support can be helpful. Group preparation sessions can often be effective. Again, an adult presence at a discrete distance can often ensure the appropriate level of work.

(8) A final check each morning prior to heading out to the exam centre of the pens, rulers, erasers, calculators, log tables, reading glasses, bottled water etc. can be very useful.

(9) Students should remind themselves that many questions are totally predictable, if not in exact content, then certainly within very narrow parameters. Know the structure of every paper you are facing and if there are formulae that regularly come up, list them on a revision card, read it carefully outside the examination hall and write them quickly into the rough work section of your answer book immediately you are given access to it.

(10) Never bring notes into the exam hall. The stress induced by such conduct will hugely affect your capacity to perform well, apart from the fact that you are likely to be caught and have your paper cancelled.

(11) Always read the paper fully before attempting any question. Map out the structure of answers on the rough work page. Only then should you attempt the question you feel most comfortable with. As you answer each question, missing pieces of your mapped out answers will pop into your mind. Write them into your rough work and continue with the question in hand.

(12) Never leave the hall before the examination is over. Reread each answer if you are finished. There will always be additional information you can add. Over the period of the entire Leaving Certificate, such a strategy can be worth an additional 15 to 20 points.