A session full of sound and fury

Denis Haughey of the SDLP was very annoyed. How could Ian Paisley and Peter Robinson have the effrontery to stroll into the Assembly, propose a motion lambasting Lord Alderdice, and then disappear from the chamber?

John Hume could only stick it for 10 minutes. Seamus Mallon stayed a little longer, but not much. The Sinn Fein, SDLP and Ulster Unionist Party seats were rapidly depleted. Surely it was reasonable that Dr Paisley and Mr Robinson should also clear out at the first opportunity.

Anybody who gets a buzz from discussions about parliamentary standing orders and repetitive points of order would have been stirred by yesterday's proceedings. Almost everybody else would have been prostrate with boredom.

To be fair to Dr Paisley and Mr Robinson they had good reason for leaving: the DUP leader was attending the funeral of a friend; Mr Robinson was at a sod-turning in his East Belfast constituency. They returned for the afternoon session of the debate.

What the Assembly needs is a dose of Betty Boothroyd. Jane Morrice of the Women's Coalition was voted in to deputise for Lord Alderdice yesterday, briefly gaining the awkward title madam acting initial presiding officer.

Throughout the day she regularly thundered the great parliamentary demand, "Order, order, order". But some Assembly members are a recalcitrant lot: rather than address yesterday's motion criticising Lord Alderdice they preferred to rerun the guillotined motion of January 18th. Ms Morrice had a hard time with them.

The motion from Ian Paisley and Peter Robinson was straight and to the point: this Assembly has no confidence in the initial presiding officer, Lord Alderdice. But much of the debate was light years from the motion.

The question now should surely be: does Lord Alderdice have any confidence in the Assembly? Having observed yesterday's debate from the back benches one could imagine him thinking that he would be far better employed concentrating on his psychiatric practice and treating the mentally disturbed rather than seeking to make sense of the Assembly's workings.

It seems unlikely that Ms Morrice of the Women's Coalition would seek the position should Lord Alderdice throw in the towel. She was in an impossible position yesterday, having to instruct members, futilely and regularly, to stick, or at least get, to the point.

The motion was tabled because Lord Alderdice allowed the UUP succeed with a guillotine motion in January during discussion of a report on devolution from David Trimble and Seamus Mallon.

That debate was due to last up to three days, but the UUP by exploiting parliamentary procedure managed to cut it to one day, to the great fury of the anti-agreement unionists, particularly the DUP.

Peter Robinson of the DUP complained that not only were DUP members denied an opportunity to voice their opposition to the report, but several members were prevented from making their maiden speeches.

Yesterday was a bad day for the maidens. As some of them spoke about UUP treachery and decommissioning, rather than the actual motion, they were bowled over by points of order. Whenever they strayed from the point - and they did, often - they were hounded by speakers on the SDLP and UUP benches who insisted they speak to the motion.

Much of the time those in the public gallery were listening to a motion of no confidence in the UUP and Mr Trimble rather than Lord Alderdice. And, bizarrely at the end, Mr Robinson sought to withdraw the motion. The opposition would not allow it. They threw out the motion. What the whole debate achieved is anybody's guess.