A Fantastic Fear of Everything

WELL, HERE’S something you don’t see every day. Thank goodness

Directed by Crispian Mills. Starring Simon Pegg, Paul Freeman, Amara Karan, Clare Higgins, Henry Lloyd-Hughes 15A cert, general release, 100 min

WELL, HERE’S something you don’t see every day. Thank goodness. Music fans with strong stomachs will remember a messy, post-psychedelic band from the 1990s called Kula Shaker. After years in the wilderness, Crispian Mills (famous son of Hayley and grandson of John), the group’s driving force, returns with a handful of half-formed ideas masquerading as a feature film.

Coming across like an unholy blend of Michel Gondry and Steptoe and Son, the dark comedy does have a perverse, insane integrity to it. Nothing about it suggests the influence of script doctors or marketing wonks.

This is, of course, the most back-handed class of praise.

A Fantastic Fear of Everything could hardly be less disordered if it had been filmed in the back of a van descending a potholed pathway at the height of a thunderstorm. Occasionally the ragged funkiness comes across as charming. More often it’s plain irritating.

Simon Pegg stars as an author of children’s stories who has decided to embark on a career in crime writing. Things are not going well. Holed up in a grim Hackney flat, he is becoming increasingly troubled by various neuroses. In particular, a phobia

of launderettes is playing havoc with his sanity. Everybody he meets glowers with wide-angle anger. His researches into Victorian crime lead him to convert innocent business contacts into relatives of Dr Crippen. Then . . . well, then more of the same follows.

There is a watchable film hiding within this largely depressing, annoyingly repetitive audiovisual dirge. After all, Harold Pinter made a career of transforming less promising scenarios into fascinating dramas. But Mills shows no great aptitude for dialogue, pacing or atmosphere. Pegg’s admirable enthusiasm – even when miming to gangster rap in a duffel coat – fails to convince us that relentless oddness is any substitute for genuine imagination.

Get back to your guitar, young man.

Donald Clarke

Donald Clarke

Donald Clarke is Film Correspondent at The Irish Times