In a Word... speaking adverbially

Sometimes, I wonder. When I see alcohol companies advise “drink responsibly”, I wonder. Their business is to sell as much drink as possible. It is their very reason for existence. Yet they also tell us, sotto voce, to “drink responsibly”.

That is like a jockey whipping the horse’s rump, digging stirrups into its flank, and pulling on the reins (if gently) at the same time.

It hardly makes a difference. Early any weekend morning, you can imagine drink company executives tripping through the empty cans, bottles, and vomit on a street near you (”been there, done that, dumped the T-shirt!”) as they remind the prone young bodies before them: “We told you naughty boys and girls to drink responsibly, tsk, tsk.”

Then, stepping delicately away, they assure one another with a “what more can we do?” shrug before heading off to, literally, count the cost.

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Or those gambling companies who advise us earnestly to “bet sensibly”. (Notice how these admonitions favour adverbs). They tell us how to gamble stress-free, anxiety-free, depression-free, sensibly and within budget. Sure.

And, thoughtfully – alongside their “most popular bets of the day” – they supply contact details for such as the Samaritans in case we might be tempted to bet the house on the following race at Leopardstown, on whether Mary Lou will be the next taoiseach, or whether Christmas Day 2022 will be white.

It might be argued that those drinks/gambling companies are doing their bit to address addiction, but I wonder. Mainly, I suspect, it’s about image.

But what of Fáilte Ireland? What is it at in sponsoring the weather on RTÉ television? Does it think Joanna Donnelly or Gerry Murphy might tone down the forecast so as to avoid putting visitors off?

‘A soft day’

Does it believe Met Éireann might shift tone from, say, “below-average temperatures with heavy rain coming from the southwest” to something like, “spells of sunshine may be interrupted by the odd shower spreading north-eastwards from Kerry (even if that only happens for All Irelands)”?

Do they think that either Joanna or Gerry will change “heavy rain” to “another soft day, thank God”, because Fáilte Ireland is sponsoring? Hardly.

So why is Fáilte Ireland sponsoring the weather forecast on RTÉ television? Damned if I know.

Adverb, from Latin “adverbium”, for “joined to verbs, limiting or extending their significance”.

inaword@irishtimes.com