WHEN I saw last week that the National Women's Council (NWC) had launched A guide to the euro for women, it was not immediately obvious to my male mind, sadly lacking in female intuition, what the specific women's take on the euro could be.
Could it be a feminist critique of the number 0.787564? A woman's deconstruction of "optimal currency areas" and the "stability pact?" A description of the feminine qualities of the euro notes and coins (no more masculine, angular edges as on our our 50p piece)? Would the Guide to the euro for women show that Bernard Connolly really ought to have written about "the rotten, lyin', cheatin' male heart of Europe"?
The guide must surely reveal some new information completely overlooked up to now, I thought. To make sure, before I got a chance to pick up a copy, I put on the 3D plastic gender-proofing glasses I had stolen from a feminist friend, and had a look around my office. With the glasses on, invisible ink stood out on all sorts of documents.
Smack in the middle of AIB Bank's The ABC of EMU in big letters was Men Only. All over Ulster Bank's Preparing for Economic and Monetary Union: a Guide for Business was a little matchstick woman surrounded by a red circle, with a diagonal red line crossing the unfortunate female.
I took a look at some bumph I had picked up at the European information office, EPIC, on Dawson Street. Talking about the Euro became Men Talking about the Euro to Men.
The Euro - your questions answered, with gender-proofing glasses on, was The euro - your man's questions answered.
The monthly newsletter InfEuro was transformed to InfEuroUOMO, and, rather alarmingly underneath the title was Entertainment for Men.
A publication of the Department of Finance Economic and Monetary Union (EMU) and the Euro had no invisible ink on it at all. The picture of Charlie McCreevy TD on the front obviously said it all.
Just before I took off the special glasses, I lifted my head and bumped into a glass ceiling I had never before noticed. Boy, I mean, child, was it low - just slightly higher than the tallest woman in the office. Bewildered and chastened, I took off the glasses and hurried away to get my copy of the Guide to the Euro for Women.
Why should you read this guide? asks the introductory section. As a non-woman, I had a slight mental reservation as to who "you" was. Did they know a man was reading it? The reader is told that "the Changeover Board of Ireland has approved (sic) the National Women's Council of Ireland for this information pack which aims to inform and prepare women for its (sic) introduction". It relates that EU surveys have shown that women are less familiar with the introduction of the euro and more negative about it than men. "It has been suggested that this negativity may be fuelled by lack of familiarity."
Why would women be less familiar with the euro than men? There is an implication that it is someone else's - that is, men's - fault, in adding "Women need to be included at all levels in relation to this significant change in our history". Included, how, in the euro changeover? By whom? Such overly-analytical thoughts occurred to me, I confess.
Anyway, on to the substance of the guide. I have to admit, I found it all interesting. There was not one sentence about which I'd say, "Ah, sure that's only aul' women's stuff". There are brief descriptions of the euro timetable, the banks and the euro, credit unions, saving and investments, changeover costs and so on. Not one sentence could be described as of specific interest to women. I'm very sorry, but it is relevant to everyone.
Patriarchically, I'd point out that euro is now with us. The guide, launched in March 1999, states that the euro will come into effect on January 1st, 1999, and doesn't include the conversion rate fixed back then. This guide to the euro for women is no such thing. It is a fraud to say it is for women, specifically. It contains just the same information as that put out by the EU, the Government, the Euro Changeover Board and Forfas, and a host of other private and public sector organisations. The NWC is just branding and packaging standard information for its constituency.
Is this fraud pernicious or just silly? In relation to the euro, it is so obviously silly that it could never be pernicious. But as an illustration of the NWC's judgment, it is truly revelatory.
Oliver O'Connor is an investment funds specialist.
