Planet soccer

By MARY HANNIGAN

Protests follow fair play display

HATS off to Italian Serie B side Ascoli after their display of Fair Play during Saturday's game at home to Reggina.

Vincenzo Sommese gave Ascoli the lead after an injured Reggina player had attempted to put the ball out of play so he could receive treatment.

Reggina weren’t best pleased and in the ensuing scrap had a player sent off for hitting Sommese.

So, what did Ascoli do? They allowed Reggina equalise, making no effort to defend as Pagano ran through and scored. Very nice.

Alas, relegation-threatened Ascoli went on to lose 3-1, but still, you’d imagine their sportsmanship earned them the respect of all concerned? Well . . .

“We were locked in the changing rooms for two hours after the game to avoid the protests,” said Ascoli coach Bepi Pillon.

“There is too much exasperation in Italy, too many interests that force you to look only at the results. It’s not fun like this.”

We’ve a feeling it’ll be the last Fair Play goal Ascoli give away, bless them.

Quotes of the week

“All this stuff about wives, girlfriends, partying – it’s no good. When you go to a World Cup, it’s like going to war. When you go to war, you don’t take the wife. You go prepared to win a battle.”

– Carlos Alberto Parreira (former Brazil and current South Africa coach) ruling out bringing the missus in to the trenches with him next summer.

“I feel like I am from Liverpool, and I want that for my family too.

“I hope to be here for a long time and if my daughter speaks English and Scouse, I will be proud. Have I picked up any Scouse? Deffo! I am picking up words all the time.”

– Fernando Torres, on course for having quite the most extraordinary accent in the history of Association Football.

“I can’t get over it. I’ve had so many sleepless nights thinking about it. And they show it on TV 20 times a day, so it’s hard to forget . . . the officials have said since that it wasn’t their fault. It’s all a load of b******s. And all that rabbiting on from Blatter? That’s b******s as well.”

– Shay Given on, well, you know.

“Earlier this week my brother Marcelo called me and he said, ‘hey, don’t forget you’re meeting our uncle Alex on Saturday’. He has been teasing me. When I see Alex Ferguson at the game on Saturday, I’ll give him a big hug and say ‘hello uncle’.”

– West Ham’s Mexican striker Guillermo Franco, whose great grandfather was Scottish. We’re wondering how Ferguson responded to the hug and greeting. Was there much blood shed, for example?

“I used to leave training and be able to go out shopping or meet up with friends in town – but not now . . . I have to conserve energy. These days I go home, put my feet up and sit on the settee watching TV or DVDs. My life is boring, boring, boring, but it’s what I have to do to stay fit.” – Ryan Giggs.

Ancelotti welcomes FA Cup draw

“The owner of Watford many years ago was Elton John. Elton John is my favourite singer. The match will be an opportunity to meet Elton John.”

– Carlo Ancelotti explaining why he was so excited about Chelsea drawing Watford in the FA Cup.

Still inspiring

AS spotted on the Daily Mail'swebsite on Saturday. For a 91-year-old who spent 27 years in prison, Andrey Arshavin is doing damn well for Arsenal.

Ferrara shocked by young abusers

AHEAD of Saturday’s 2-1 win against Inter Milan, Juventus coach Ciro Ferrara was asked about concerns that the club’s supporters would racially abuse Inter’s Mario Balotelli. Insisting that the club had done all it could to “calm this situation”, Ferrara said he was against all forms of racism, “just as I am against all types of insults against anyone”.

“I remember being upset and confused when I first came up to Turin to play and heard all these chants against ‘dirty’ Neapolitans.”

What shocks Ferrara more than anything, though, is when those dishing out the abuse are kiddies.

“When I see a child go to the stadium with his parents and make nasty hand gestures at opponents, I don’t understand how that can happen. If my child did that, I’d give him a slap,” he said.

Just as well he didn’t get his hands on this Feyenoord supporter a few years’ back.

More quotes of the week

“A winning side must maintain the same attitude after victories and defeats, others go crazy with success and treat a setback like the apocalypse.”

– Jose Mourinho speaking before Saturday’s apocalyptic defeat to Juventus.

“I’m human and I made a mistake. I have my flaws too.”

– Tiger Woods? No, no — Cristiano Ronaldo after getting sent off for Real Madrid on Saturday.

“There’s more chance of me buying one of Michael Owen’s horses than getting rubbed with horse placenta.”

– Portsmouth goalkeeper David James on the current craze among injured footballers.

“I have an orthomanual therapist who I call Jan-Jan the hammer man. Twice a year I see him. He scans the whole of my body to find out which bones and joints are out of place because of all the kicks I get. He bangs with a hammer on the places where I have been kicked and puts all the bones, joints and ligaments back into place.”

– Liverpool’s Dirk Kuyt should probably consider getting rubbed with horse placenta.