Grave undertaking: It is not every after-dinner speaker who would agree to speak at the Dublin undertakers' Christmas party but that it is exactly what Leinster team manager Ken Ging has agreed to do tonight. He has already received a bit of ribbing about it being the perfect place to die on his feet as he would certainly be well looked after. After that engagement taking on Montferrand in the Heineken European Cup won't seem half as bad next weekend.
Clothes encounter
At the recent IRFU Charitable Trust dinner, Peter Sutherland proved a very popular guest speaker. One anecdote in particular brought the house down. It concerned two well known former internationals and IRFU committee men who hail from Cork. Walking down Oxford Street in London, Noel turns to Tommy and says, "Tom would ye look at that shop over there. Shirts £2, trousers £1.50. That's unbelievable, we'll go in and buy their entire stock. Think of all the money we can make when we get back home."
So playing it cool they walk into the shop and to avoid attracting too much attention they adopt English accents. "We'd like to buy your entire stock of shirts and trousers."
The assistant looks at them for a couple of seconds and ventures: "You're from Cork aren't you?"
Stunned, Noel responds: "How'd ye know that, boy?"
"Because we're a dry cleaners sir."
Fiji cited for knees-up
It seems the Fijian squad went a little overboard in "celebrating" their 36-22 defeat by Scotland recently. The Fiji rugby union's chief executive, Pio Bosco Tikoisuva, has called for an urgent meeting with senior tour officials to clarify a media report that squad members were boisterous and drunk at an Edinburgh hotel. A Scottish newspaper contacted the hotel but they claimed while there was minor disruption to a couple of the guests, no damage was done to the hotel. According to the article the players were alleged to have been drinking from 9 p.m. to 4 a.m. Tikoisuva will conduct his own investigation but will write to the Scottish Rugby Union and the hotel to ascertain what compensation would be appropriate.
He ventured: "If the allegations are true this is not the sort of behaviour we want associated with the team or the country. It's one thing to celebrate at the end of a tour but another to disrupt a hotel."
The SRU had provided £20,000 to support the Fijians' tour and it is believed the IRFU offered a similar financial handout.
It seems to be a bit of a storm in a teacup when one considers the antics of yesteryear with beds being thrown out of hotel windows, fire extinguisher fights and televisions ending up in car-parks. How times have changed.
Scrumhalf bounced
South African and Natal Sharks scrumhalf Craig Davidson probably wished he had played in the international Test against England at Twickenham, for all its ferocity, rather than falling foul of a bouncer in a Durban nightclub where he was a VIP guest.
The local Durban newspaper, the Mercury, reported that Davidson had been assaulted after being asked to leave the nightclub. He was taken to hospital by friends and required four stitches. It is hardly surprising to learn he is considering having the bouncer charged with assault.
He was ruled out of the recent trip by the Springboks to Europe with a knee injury. He visited the nightclub but was asked to leave in an aggressive manner and despite claiming he told the bouncer he was going, the report says he was summarily grabbed and escorted to the door. According to the player once they were outside the bouncer hit him twice.
The club owner was quoted as saying: "Craig is a VIP member of the club and a friend and it is a very awkward situation." He confirmed that the bouncer in question had been suspended.
Rougerie takes action
It seems we were a little premature in the column last week in reporting that French wing Aurelien Rougerie, who suffered a horrific throat injury in a pre-season friendly against Wasps that required surgery on a couple of occasions, had declined to sue over the tackle incident.
We have learned this week the French star has started legal proceedings and is seeking compensation from Wasps for the incident that involved hooker Phil Greening. Rougerie's lawyer Jean Paul Brousse has started legal proceedings that could lead to a full-blown court case.
In conversation with the Daily Mail newspaper Brousse admitted: "At this stage all I am asking the court is to authorise a medical examination of the player to establish the exact state of his injuries, incapacity and pain. The court will then produce a report. On that basis we will calculate the sum involved and press for compensation from Wasps. There is a price for the pain, for the scar on Aurelien's neck and a price for loss of earnings.
"If we reach an agreement for compensation with Wasps, fine. If not we will go back to court."
Rougerie has only just returned to the gym where he is permitted a 20-minute work-out and it is still unclear whether the French international wing will play rugby again.
AIB Team of the Month
By popular demand the AIB/Irish Times team of the month returns to acclaim the top club players in the AIB League Division One. As in previous years an AIB/Irish Times team of the season will be chosen at the end of the current campaign honouring the best players in their respective positions with the nominees receiving their awards at a special dinner. The team will be chosen by The Irish Times rugby writers and announced after the last round of games in the league format.
The first AIB Team of the month is:
M Leek
(Lansdowne)
N McNamara G Brown R Botha J McWeeney
(Shannon) (Blackrock) (Belfast H) (St Mary's)
E Farrell P McCarthy
(Blackrock) (Cork Constitution)
W O'Kelly J Flannery S Kerr
(Clontarf) (Galwegians) (Garryowen)
M McCullough D Sheehan
(Ballymena) (Garryowen)
D Quinlan R Nelson P Malone
(Shannon) (Ballymena) (Garryowen)
