There was something disturbing about BBC presenter Michael Buerk sitting there in his hopelessly inadequate hospital pinafore. Knowing that he had nothing on underneath was almost too much to bear. Worse was to come. Former smoker Buerk smiled limply at the doctor, having just come out of an anaesthetic, and declared he was safe.
"So far I seem to think I've gotten away with it," he said.
Perhaps like the time the lawn mower shaved his toe and actually spilt the rubber on his wellington boot, or when his Range Rover had a blow out at 58 m.p.h. on the M2. Living on the edge Buerk style.
There is something about BBC presenters that makes a lasting impression. It is the image they project that smoking is about the most dangerous habit they could ever hope to contemplate. And so Buerk, unlike former snooker World Champion Alex Higgins, got away with it.
Tobacco Wars, on Tuesday on BBC 1, set up the industry and smoked them out of the plantation. No tears there. Just entirely one dimensional: smoking kills and the industry is amoral.
Listen to Higgins croak his way through the programme. Ask him to pull away the scarf and show the scar where the doctors gouged out a piece of his neck.
Higgins, unlike Buerk, was the most self-destructive person on the planet for about 30 years, and he has said some memorable things, most notably to Denis Taylor. He added another this week when asked about Embassy, the sponsors of the world championship he won twice.
"Insincere shower of bastards," said the Hurricane.
What framed the industry as duplicitous and sinister wasn't Buerk's attempt at bad soap opera, or Higgins railing against Embassy, or even that the "safe" cigarette which has been developed, which didn't give hamsters cancer, would never see a lighted match. No, it was the tobacco industry's reaction when governments started tightening the noose in terms of advertising.
They kicked and screamed, then moved quietly into sports sponsorship. They turned primarily to rugby (John Player Cup), snooker (Embassy World Championships and Benson and Hedges Irish Masters), cricket (Benson and Hedges Trophy) and Formula 1 (well, where do you start?) and made them into branding extravaganzas.
Who would be cynical enough to think the industry passed around the fat cigars when they thought of the heaven-sent prospect of roping in the kids as well as the adults to their glamour products?
"There were two standards," said Tobacco Wars, "one for advertising, the other for sponsorship of sport. They perverted science, they perverted medicine," claimed the programme. And then they conquered sport.
Like performance enhancing drugs in cycling, the tobacco industry have lived a badly concealed lie for years. When a Dr Homburger carried out some experiments which showed that cigarettes killed people, the industry called on him and asked him to take out a couple of words in his report. A little piffling, you might think, but the words were, you might say, essential: like death, cancer, concern. They were kept in the report.
"I think they hated my guts," said Dr Homburger. Oh yes, I think so.
The issue is not whether people should chose to smoke, but whether they have been denied information that would have given them an informed choice. Furthermore, suppose a 12-year-old boy, who wants to be Damon Hill, watched yesterday's grand prix in Hockenheim: does Hill driving a box of Benson and Hedges with wheels allow the boy to make an informed choice?
Then again, perhaps Hill was a bad example. These days he has been driving his super-charged Jordan ciggy like Buerk might navigate a diesel Range Rover with his chances of winning anything significant this season the same as being struck by lightning.
On that subject, Retief Goosen, the South African golfer currently in Ireland competing at the K Club, might have an opinion. Goosen, RTE commentator Alex Hay told us during coverage of the European Open, was struck by lightning when he was a boy.
"They say it changed his character. He's the type who likes to keep himself to himself now," said Hay.
More garrulous is Darren Clarke. Clarke struck gold, not lightning, on Saturday when most people were being rashered in the sun. At around lunch time Clarke had a birdie putt on the final hole for a round of 59 as he murdered Michael Smurfit's course. It was like watching a sub 9.90 second 100 metres, or Haile Gebrselaisse running two sub four-minute miles back to back.
If golf is your thing, then lucky you. Ciaran Monaghan and Hay are fine commentators, but if you wanted swimming in the European Championships or top class athletics, the national broadcaster doesn't want to know. We know this because they are not sending to the athletics World Championships in Seville this month. Sonia isn't there so there's no point. Right?
Eurosport covered the swimming every day, and on Wednesday we watched something significant. Alexander Popov was beaten in the 100 metres freestyle, by a Dutch guy called Van den Hoogenband, for the first time in four European Championships. Just thought you'd like to know.
BBC's Grandstand on Saturday interviewed Doug Walker, the Scottish 200 metres runner who tested positive and was then let off. Athletes don't go near legal drugs like tobacco, but stick to the illegal ones that really get the heart thumping. A grim Brendan Foster asked the runner how he felt.
"I'll take the positives out of the negatives and use them to my advantage," said Walker. Bad choice of words, Dougie.
