Sir, - Despite having been wined and dined most assiduously, it seems that Herr Hans Tietemeyer retains lingering doubts about this pubescent country's readiness to have its own euro currency account. I wonder if it would be a sufficient sweetener for him if we offered the name "Luas" in exchange for that ridiculous "Euro"?
"Euro" would do fine for our new transport system, especially in view of who is paying for it besides which the money is likely to be the faster of the two. What could be more apt to spend one's luas change on a euro ride past the back gardens of Ranelagh Milltown and Dundrum?
I suggest that Herr Tietemeyer might be attracted by the notion that hole in the wall machines would be saved from being called "euronals", not least because they are a public convenience at which the female of the species is to be found standing in increasing numbers. Herr Hans, obviously, will be quite passionate in pursuit of luasidity, but he is unlikely to want to be referred to as a eurologist or a eurosurgeon.
Hans Tietemeyer will never willingly luasen the purse strings, but surely, if we can be bound to the new currency by the bonds of paternity to the extent that it owes us its very name, he will not seek a barring order against us? - Yours, etc.,
Stillorgan,
Co Dublin.