FROM THE ARCHIVES:The ever-expanding rabbit population was the bane of the lives of farmers and gardeners in the 1950s. Then came the deliberate and illegal introduction of myxomatosis, a viral disease which spread rapidly among rabbits and killed them in a slow and nasty way by blinding them and destroying their resistance to other diseases. Quidnunc, in this Irishman's Diary in 1955, had a more humane alternative to solving the problem if only someone would have asked him.
IT WAS very disappointing. All the week I had waited patiently for someone to turn the conversation round to rabbits. We discussed the weather, holidays on the Continent, dogs, the price of sausages (this, I thought, was a narrow shave) and horses; but the bunnies never got a single syllable.
I wanted to meet some gardener with a rabbit problem. It seems that myxomatosis has done away with the rabbits, and hence the problem. If I had found somebody worried about rabbits, the conversation was meant to go something like this:
MAN-WITH-THE-RABBIT-PROBLEM: “But I tell you – there are rabbits as big as [derby winner] Tulyar in my garden. I have tried everything, but I can’t get rid of them. Now they are so bold they gather around every time I start digging, to see what’s for lunch.”
ME: “I can tell you 12 different ways of getting rid of your rabbits. Personally, I would recommend the bottle treatment.”
M.W.R.P.: “The what treatment?”
ME: “Bottle treatment. Collect some empty glass bottles and stand them, neck downwards, among the lettuce.”
M.W.R.P.: “And how will that rid my garden of rabbits?”
At this stage the climax of the rabbit conversation would be reached. I would dip into my pocket and produce a book. Thumbing through the pages, I would come to an illustration of a horrified rabbit staring aghast at the reflection in an upturned bottle of a horrified rabbit staring aghast.
If that did not convince the M.W.R.P., I would read to him the 11 alternative ways of getting rid of rabbits, all printed alongside the evidence.
This little book has given me much enjoyment since I got it from the the United States Information Services. It is the Ford 1954 Almanac for farm, ranch and home, “an annual review of practical, scientific and helpful information on farming, ranching and country life”.
In case there are really some readers with rabbit problems it would be well to point out that the Ford Almanac guarantees only one of its dozen ways of keeping Bunny out of the garden. That is to use a rabbit-tight fence.
However, I would like to experiment with tip No. 3 – “Put a row of soybeans at garden edge – and hope they like soybeans”; or tip No. 6 – “scatter dried blood.” It does not say whose blood. Tip No. 8 is more explicit. It says “Use Epsom salts in spray.”
It would be interesting to know if the bottle treatment would have been as effective as myxomatosis. Perhaps the rabbits would have taken to wearing dark glasses.