US: As jokes about the US presidential election year start to appear on the Internet, Donald Myers in New York has a look at the humour on offer
An Internet gag goes like this: Einstein, Picasso and George Bush die and arrive together at the Pearly Gates. St Peter tells them: "You all look like who you claim to be, but you have no idea the lengths to which some people will go to sneak in to heaven. Can you prove who you really are?" Einstein asks for a blackboard and some chalk, and scrawls the symbols that prove his theory of relativity.
St Peter is suitably impressed. "Welcome to heaven, Einstein!" he says, then asks for Picasso's credentials. Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk. "Come on in," St Peter says to Pablo.
Then St Peter looks at President Bush, scratches his head and says: "Einstein and Picasso proved their identity. How can you prove yours?"
Looking bewildered, Bush says: "Who are Einstein and Picasso?" St Peter sighs and says: "Come on in, George."
The jokes are nasty in cyberspace this election year. On political-humour websites, Bush is parodied by Democrats as a boob in a dunce cap. John Kerry, Bush's likely opponent, is portrayed by Republicans as a flip-flopping wimp in a beret.
At www.nojohnkerry.org, there is a poster of Kerry holding a daisy, ringed by the words "give peace a chance", while the World Trade Center towers burn in the background. "John Kerry for president?" the headline asks.
Many of the political joke websites sprang up during the Clinton years and the 2000 presidential campaign. Chuck Frye, 34, an information systems manager in Northern California, started his NoJohnKerry site earlier this spring. "I am a proud member of the unofficial Internet GOP Attack Dog Squad," Frye said. "This is my very small personal effort to help re-elect President Bush and keep John Kerry out of the White House." Under a "Just a Gigolo" headline on Frye's site, conservative commentator and author Ann Coulter mocks Kerry, the husband of ketchup heiress Teresa Heinz Kerry: "If Democrats want to talk about middle-class tax cuts, couldn't they nominate someone who hasn't been a poodle to rich women for the past 33 years?"
With five months left before the presidential election, the Internet can be a comedy club, ranging from established sites such as www.theonion.com and www.modernhumorist.com to smaller, more esoteric sites such as www.pantsonfire.net, www.bushorchimp.com and www.zug.com.
The number of political-humour sites and the visitors they attract are growing rapidly. The NoJohnKerry site gets about 2,500 daily hits, a total of 128,000 since it started a few months ago, Frye said.
A site related to PantsOnFire, www.spankbush.net, has received 250,000 hits since its inception in October 2002, according to Aaron Toso, spokesman for TrueMajority/ACTION PAC, an anti-Bush group dedicated to online activism.
"Interest is heating up," Toso said. The SpankBush site allows the president's opponents to spank his bare bottom, interactively, online. The site had 13,000 visitors in January, 16,000 in February and 22,000 in March, according to Toso.
Many political-humour sites are riddled with foul language and darker jokes than you might find on TV with Jay Leno, David Letterman, Jon Stewart or Conan O'Brien.
"Political jokes on the web are more visceral and more mean-spirited because they can get away with it," said Matthew T Felling of the Center for Media and Public Affairs in Washington.
With the war in Iraq, ongoing investigations of the terrorist attacks on September 11th, 2001, rising gasoline prices and a gloomy economic outlook, the Internet is an avenue for political frustration, according to John Hargrave, operator of Zug.com, a 9-year-old site that features jokes, pranks, video clips and other humorous material.
"Comedy works best in frustrating situations," said Hargrave, 31, of Boston, "and we are in frustrating political times. On one hand, Bush is very good for the comedy business because he's such a big target. On the other hand, think about being in the family of a soldier over in Iraq - that's not funny." Perhaps that could explain some of the darker Internet humour.
At www.bushorchimp.com, the president is compared to a chimpanzee, with similar facial expressions. At www.bumpertalk.com, a sign says: "Save the baby seals, club a liberal instead." At GOPfun.com, John Kerry, bearded and turbaned, is parodied as "Osama bin Invietnam." A photograph of a B-52 bomber, parked on a runway lined with bombs and missiles ready for loading, carries a football analogy in the headline: "The terrorists have won the toss and have elected to receive." At www.whitehouse.org - a spoof of the official White House website - the Bush Cabinet is renamed. Defence Secretary Mr Donald Rumsfeld is "Secretary Strangelove." Interior Secretary Gayle Norton is "Secretary Strip Mine." Labour Secretary Elaine Chao is "Secretary Sweatshop."
"Bush's caricature has evolved from a smirking monkey to a free-firing cowboy, darker in nature," said Felling.
"Kerry's defining characteristic has yet to be formed. The comedians are trying to figure out if they're going to make him the flip-flopper, the peacenik, the Botoxed man or the marry-rich fellow." - (Newsday)
Conor O'Clery is on leave. His America column will reappear next Saturday.