Staffroom: Do they learn the Ten Commandments any more?" a worried parent asked me. Her child is in second class, preparing for First Penance and rejoicing in the fact that Jesus loved the children and told them that they were the greatest.

I explained to her that these basic tenets of Christian religion would indeed be taught at a more advanced level in her child's education and she wondered if his ego would be able to handle them at that stage. Good thinking.

I am inclined to agree with her that the modern child will grow up with an exaggerated sense of self importance. The local curate, who visits frequently, tells them they're wonderful. The resource teacher, who puts her head round the door occasionally, tells me they are splendid. I am the worst offender in this regard. I always use superlatives when praising their endeavours and their behaviour.

As they queue up to go home each evening, I hand them out sweets and bid them "slán abhaile", believing it a good idea to send them home on a positive note. It is high time we shed the shackles of negativity. We celebrate the innate goodness of the pupils in our care and we make no apology for it.

Nevertheless all is not rosy in our academy. The role of charlady does not lie easily on my shoulders and I find myself harbouring revolutionary ideas in this regard. My cleaning lady is paid a handsome amount of euros to clean my already clean home. I, on the other hand, remain on after school, washing sticky, crayonny tables, and hoovering muddy, grimy carpets - free-gratis and for nought.

How sad it is that, while teachers have become more progressive in their approach to pupils, the system seems to have become more regressive in its treatment of teachers.

My revolutionary ideas? Take early retirement and make way for a young graduate with a big ego and a short fuse.