Myles’s knowledge of railway engineering was encyclopaedic – probably – although he may have cogged some of it from trade magazines as well. I suspect it was an advertisement for the Swindon railway works – then a vast establishment employing 14,000 people – that inspired this flight into romantic melodrama. Typically, the female lead is called “Bella”. – FRANK McNALLY
DVORAK’S HUMORESKE is taken up by the muted first fiddles and passed to the wood-wind. The scene is the lofty richly-panelled office of an Irish Locomotive Superintendent. It is evening.
From the nearby yards comes the hiss of steam and now and again, the gentle susurrus of a shunter’s cut away lap valve. The Superintendent is at the window lost in thought, his hands in his trousers’ pockets and his great shoulders hunched.
Nearby is seated his personal secretary. She is young and gazes at the granite form of the old steam man with troubled, wistful eyes. Bloom of youth’s fullest peach mantles her cheek. Ringlets of amber fall peerlessly on the white neck. Her queenly hands toy with a pencil of 18-carat gold. Her name is Bella.
There is silence. Over it steals the long hiss of a goods compound as it comes to rest far away. The gathering dusk enriches the majestic timbering of the old room.
Bella speaks at last, her voice the gentle voice that is used by angels.
Bella: Penny for them, super.
Superintendent(starting slightly): 0 nothing; Bella. Nothing.
Bella:Something is making you sad.
Superintendent:It is nothing. I see 316 is in again. That is the second time this week. Her twin blast pipes are gone again.
Bella: But do not let that prey upon your mind, super. The Works Manager will fix her up again. The Works Manager is a clever man. He will make her as good as new.
Superintendent(turning slightly with a sad smile) : It is nice of you to talk like that, Bella. You are a good kid. But we must face facts. The Works Manager will never make a job of her. I am afraid . . .
Bella(softly): Yes . . . ?
Superintendent: I am afraid old 316 will never take the road again. (He turns back to the window to gaze at his black charges as they move about the yards, each with its white plumes of steam.
A lump rises in his throat and the shade of pain crosses the strong face.)
Bella:Please do not talk like that. She will ride many thousands of road-miles yet.
Superintendent(almost gruffly): Her twin blast pipes are gone, I tell you. (He pauses) I am sorry, Bella. I am sorry. That old job has me worried. I am not myself.
Bella: But, Super, we have others.
Superintendent(bitterly): We have. And bar the two 1928 single expansion jobs, there is not a sound job in the yard. Hasn't 475 a superheat that rots her with condensation?
Bella:I know.
Superintendent:And 278 is destroyed with wiredrawing, 604's best is 141bs per I.H.P. and 433 has been behaving like an old tram. The Board won't give me any money. The Works Manager says he must have three new compounds by October. I tell you there is no way out, Bella. I am a broken man.
Bella(gently): But, Super, there is always the Royal British Locomotive Corporation of Swindon.
Superintendent(irritably): I told you the Board won't part.
Bella:
But, Super, the B.L.C. people are different. They will let us pay over twenty years.
Superintendent:What! Do you mean that?
Bella:Of course, darling. For a few hundred pounds down we can get a brand new de Glehn job with a draw-bar horse-power of 3,750.
Superintendent(excitedly): And with poppet valves ?
Bella: Yes, cute ones that give a wide port opening
Superintendent: – With satisfactory mean depth and a straight steam path?
Bella: Of course!
Superintendent(rushing to embrace her): Bella , DARLING! Let us go and see them to-morrow!
Bella:Yes, Super, they will give us everything we want. That is why the B.L.C. is known as the Happy House for Locomotive Superintendents. And they do not ask for references.
Superintendent(dreamily): O, darling, I feel so happy. I am a new man. (Thinks: Thank heaven for Bella. Now I will never have to worry any more about unsatisfactory ratio of mean horse-power to square foot of evaporative heating surface "foaming", "blasting", or dirty feed water.)
From far away comes the long hoarse hoot of the night goods pulling out, working at 16 per cent, of rated tractive effort.
Fade out with the overture to Zampa.