How agreeable are you?
Being agreeable doesn’t mean that you actually have to concur with somebody. It means that you’re agreeable to listen to people, to take on board their points of view and opinions, accept what they’re saying, and then negotiate or discuss around it.
What’s your middle name, and what do you think of it?
Patricia is my middle name, and it’s after my father, who was Patrick or Paddy. I’m very proud of the name because I adored my father. He was a great role model, a quiet man, a good listener, and a good person. I always tried to be like my father. He never drank. I never drank. He worked very hard, and I work hard. My father was a very caring man, and while I’m not so sure I’m as caring as he is, I certainly would like to think I’m following in his footsteps.
Where was your favourite place in Ireland?
It’s home, because I don’t often get to be there. Home is just outside Gorey, Co Wexford, and has been for the last 38 years. I was raised in Tullow, Co Carlow, but when I get to be at home, I love it. Everything that I value and cherish comes from home. It’s a great place to switch off from my job and return, I suppose, to being an ordinary individual who can enjoy simple country life.
Describe yourself in three words.
I had to ask others to describe me first and then decide what I’d take out of it. Funnily enough, the same words kept coming up from those I asked. One of the words would be determined. I always believed that failure wasn’t an option, and if I did fail at something, then it wasn’t such a failure that I couldn’t start again. The second word is passionate. I am absolutely passionate about anything I’ve done. I was a teacher for most of my life, and I loved it every single day. I gave a lot to it, but I also received an awful lot from it. The third word is caring. I’m not a saint in any shape or form, but I think that if I can do something for others and care for them and their needs, I would do so. My husband sometimes says that I’m too caring, and that I give too much time to thinking about and working for others.
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When did you last get angry?
I don’t do anger. I might get cross, which is something different. I can get cross with people who I think are doing something that is unfair or wrong.
What have you lost that you would like to have back?
My parents. I’d like my youth back again, too.
What is your strongest childhood memory?
We lived inland, and in the summer we used to go to the seaside in Courtown Harbour, Wexford, and eat sandwiches that always ended up with sand in them. They’re the kind of memories that bring back images of sitting close to the beach, and my mother would bring along treats like biscuits, Kimberley biscuits. When we weren’t at the beach, we’d be watching GAA matches on television on Sunday afternoons. We weren’t necessarily a big GAA household, and coming from Carlow, I’m afraid we didn’t have much to go after!
Where do you come in your family’s birth order, and has it defined you?
I have four younger siblings, two brothers and two sisters, so I’m the eldest, and it certainly has had a big bearing. The eldest was the trailblazer in the house. I set the standards, and the others were expected to follow. It was a responsibility, and even to this day, I still feel obliged to look after them. Not that they need me to look after them in any way, but I will always feel that I have to look out for them. I’m always concerned about their safety, their wellbeing, their health – even though their own families don’t really need me to do it. I suppose it’s just part of growing up, and part of the way you are, isn’t it?
What do you expect to happen when you die?
I believe there is a God, and I do hope to meet God. That said, I’m not sure he would open the door to me straight away. He might leave me in the hallway for a while, because I certainly wouldn’t have had the perfect life. I would have a very strong faith, I believe in an afterlife, and I believe that I’ll get there eventually. I hope the man down below is not waiting for me as well. I want to go up, not down.
When were you happiest?
I can’t pinpoint any one particular time, because there has been, and is, a lot of happiness in my life. Happiness is what you make it, and what makes you happy from day to day can be different. Family is number one. If you’re with your family and they’re well, and everything is going well, that’s when I’m at my happiest. Little things can make me happy, too. At this stage of my life, waking up in the morning is the first sign of a happy day.
I don’t have regrets in the sense that there’s nothing I didn’t do that I wanted to do. I’ve been lucky in life. I’ve got to do most of what I wanted to do
Which actor would play you in a biopic about your life?
Let me think who would play me... I’m trying to think of her name… She was a very determined lady who always played strong roles. Ah, yes, Bette Davis! The other name I’ll mention was more about the role she played than anything else – Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich. But Bette Davis first, I think.
What is your biggest career/personal regret?
I don’t really have regrets in life. If I were to live my life all over again, I would. If I were to look back, I’d say I would have liked more resources and time to do things, for example, in my teaching career. I don’t think there was something wrong with it; it’s just that at the time, certain things weren’t available, so you made the best of what you had. I don’t have regrets in the sense that there’s nothing I didn’t do that I wanted to do. I’ve been lucky in life. I’ve got to do most of what I wanted to do.
Have you any psychological quirks?
I’m not so sure that I can identify anything in particular. Other people might say that I’m very straight. Once, when somebody was asked to describe me, they said I’m brutally honest. They were the exact words – brutally honest in what I do, what I say, how I perform. There’s nothing hidden about me, nothing unusual, nothing quirky, nothing that you can’t read about me. I’m just very straightforward and honest.
In conversation with Tony Clayton-Lea
