A 51-year-old man, who tipped a dustpan of dirt over his former partner’s head after she dressed up to go shopping for a wedding dress, has been jailed for nine months and ordered to pay her €10,000 for counselling .
The man, who cannot be named for legal reasons, had previously pleaded guilty to coercively controlling the woman between January 1st, 2019 and May 1st, 2021 and to assault causing harm to the woman on March 14th, 2021 at the home in Cork they shared at the time.
At Cork Circuit Criminal Court on Thursday, Judge Sinéad Behan recalled the evidence of Det Garda Paul Cogan of the Cork City Division Protective Services Unit, who told how the man had made the woman’s life a misery after they started a relationship.
The couple had a child together and on the day they left the maternity hospital with the baby, he sat in their car and sent her into a local supermarket to buy nappies and other items while she was still bleeding from the birth.
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When they got home with the newborn baby, the man said he was tired and went to bed, where he spent much of the next fortnight. He left his partner to look after the baby without ever offering to help, the court had heard.
The couple later got engaged and, on one occasion, when she got dressed up to meet her mother to pick a wedding dress, the man tipped a dustpan of dirt over her head. He also used to spit in her face and stand on her toes.
Det Garda Cogan said the man used to insult and criticise the woman over her appearance, calling called her “a fat bitch”. He weaponised their child to say that the mother was “an evil bitch” and he threatened her by saying the child would be taken into care by social services, the court heard.
On another occasion, the man locked her out of the family home and told her she would have to wait outside for 30 minutes. If she complained or tried to get back into the house, he would add five minutes to her lock-out time, the court heard.
Det Garda Cogan had testified that the defendant was also gaslighting the woman, claiming she was an alcoholic and a liar with mental health problems. During this period of coercive control, she started to doubt her sanity and sense of reality.
Det Garda Colgan gave evidence that the woman was in constant fear of her partner when they were together and he would regularly ring her in work and reduce her to tears by the verbal abuse on the phone. He said gardaí found text messages that corroborated her statement.
When the man physically assaulted her on March 14th, 2021, he grabbed her by the hair and dragged her onto the landing in their home. After pulling out some of her hair, he punched her in the face, leading to bruising and causing one of her teeth to chip, the garda said.
Defence counsel Tom Creed SC pleaded for leniency, pointing out that his client had pleaded guilty and had no previous convictions. He added that he was a contributing member of society and his employer had kept his position available for him while he was on remand.
He said the man was seeking to do a course with MOVE (Men Overcoming Violent Emotions) Ireland, while a psychotherapist and a psychologist had both assessed him as being at a low risk of re-offending, though a probation report put him at moderate risk of reoffending.
Judge Behan noted the probation report found that he had limited insight into his offending and was engaging in victim blaming where he was disputing the severity of the abusive behaviour that he had inflicted on his former partner.
She made reference to the long duration of the coercive control, saying it was among the aggravating factors that had to be considered. An additional aggravating factor was the place where the abuse took place. The judge said the couple’s home should have been a place of sanctuary and safety.
His guilty plea was, however, a mitigating factor as it spared his victim the trauma of a trial where she would have had to give evidence and revisit the various degrading and humiliating behaviours he subjected her to.
“Coercive control is an invidious type of crime involving control of the victim,” said Judge Behan. “As the injured party said, while bruises may disappear, psychological damage can be long-lasting. It is behaviour which is designed to control and intimidate and degrade the injured party.
“He has written a letter of apology. I note he has engaged in therapy . . . I have to take into consideration society’s condemnation of this kind of behaviour and the principle of deterrence has to be taken into consideration.”
She sentenced the accused to 18 months in jail but suspended the final nine months in light of his guilty pleas to both charges. She also ordered him to pay €10,000 to his victim so she can avail of counselling.
