European Cup DiaryA proper Ulster welcome turned into a right nightmare for Toulouse as we kicked off our challenge, writes Trevor Brennan
Stand up for the Ulstermen! Stand up for the Ulstermen! They just keep singing it again and again. I can't even get it out of my head. And what a game - if you're from Ulster! We had headed off on Friday morning, having our rendezvous at 8.30am in the club and our petit dejeuner. From there we went off to Blagnac Airport for our chartered flight with about 200 sponsors from the club. Everyone was in good form.
After checking in I went for a coffee with Alf, and a few conversations were struck up with the sponsors. They were in good form too, looking for autographs and photographs, etc. After boarding the plane and arriving in Belfast, we took a bus to the beautiful, four-star La Mon Hotel and Country Club in Newtownards.
Going in the door, I was greeted by Francis Brady, the hotel's managing director.
"How's it going Trevor? You and your team are very welcome to our hotel."
Then it clicked with me - how I'd met this fella before. I'd stayed here a few years ago with the Ireland As when we played France.
The room were great, the food was fantastic and the facilities - the gym, the swimming pool - were all top-notch. After a siesta for a couple of hours we headed off for our team run in Ravenhill at 3pm.
Guy Noves called in all the guys to the middle of the pitch - as is his ritual - and gave his speech about Belfast being a city used to hardship and conflict. He referred to the Ulster team as having the same characteristics to the city it represents and told us to be prepared.
Match day. I woke up at 8.0 and had the breakfast. An hour and a half later I had the dinner, as the kick-off was at 1.30 and we're used to having lunch four hours before kick-off. It was a bit like D'Unbelievables - get up in the morning and have the breakfast, lunch and dinner so as to get a good run at the day. The usual pre-match meal was there, chicken and pasta, and salad. It was hard to swallow, as the result would be.
A walk around the hotel grounds was followed by the reve musculaire - literally "waking up the muscles". Then we headed off to the ground. The lads were happy, the sun was shining - perfect French conditions.
Going into the ground and walking from the bus to the changing-rooms I was warmly welcomed by a load of Ulster supporters - "How's it going Trevor?" "Best of luck Trevor."
It was, I have to say, genuinely warm, and it was always the same when I played with Leinster.
As you all know, we were three tries and 30-3 down by the end of the first half. Running in at half-time I was feeling numb. I couldn't believe this was happening.
When we got to the dressingroom there was silence for a few minutes. Then Guy spoke about our defence. In this game there's very little margin for errors. A player can be 20 centimetres off the pace or take their eye off the ball for a split second and it can result in a score. In this case, before you realise it, you can be 30 points down. The scoreless second half saw an improvement, but not nearly enough.
In hindsight, all I can say about the performance as individuals and as a team is that we do not go out there - as is so often reported - to deliberately not turn up. Toulouse always goes out to win: reaching finals and winning is our goal. Anything else is considered a failure. Maybe this expectation is backfiring on us a bit and is causing more pressure than we are willing to admit.
Expectations can hinder spontaneity and spirit. It's time for us to get back to basics, and to start enjoying our game more. Rebounding from this loss will be a test of our character as a team and as individuals. We know we have the talent and the experience. This weekend against London Irish we have to show our resilience.
Forget expectations. Most teams in this competition have the ability to win this European Cup, but only one will, and that is because they believe they can, not because others expect them to do so.
The journey home was tough. Let's just say there weren't too many autographs or photographs being sought. It reminded me of a quote from Seán Boylan's book, a saying that he'd picked up a few years ago: "When you win, you've 1,000 fathers. When you lose, you're like an orphan."
Jeff Dubois broke his cheekbone after an accidental clash of heads with me, and is out for two months; Frederic Michalak isn't back yet and Jean-Baptiste Elissalde's hamstring isn't right. Yannick Nyanga won't make it and Finau Maka might, or might not, be back.
As for myself, I doubt I'll be playing. I couldn't train all last week with a sciatic nerve problem. I can't even touch my toes. It was a gamble playing me last week.
I'D LIKE TO CONGRATULATE the Irish teams. Irish rugby is in a good state. Whatever they're doing, they're doing it right.
I also have to say it was one of the cleanest games I've ever played in.
The one altercation I had was with Justin Harrison when we nearly got into a fight. Whereas the Trevor Brennan of six or seven years ago probably would have lashed out, I thought to myself: 'Right Trev, don't lash out here. Don't start punching him. Here we are, 30 points down, and if I get a red card, what good will it do?'
I wasn't surprised to be cited two days later - I was shocked. Nobody came out of the game with injuries except poor Jeff.
We watched the video on Monday with the help of a local referee who we always work with. Yannick Jauzion's yellow card for a supposed spear tackle was very harsh, and none of us could figure out why Fabien Pelous was binned. Mistakes happen in all competitions. Sometimes the refs get it wrong. But for 20 minutes we played the game with 14 men.
It also seems extraordinary that in 12 matches, featuring 24 teams, three of the five players cited were from one team. So that's hanging over us too.
But the message Guy is getting across is that we're not to panic. He pointed out where the three tries came from.
We started to watch London Irish yesterday. Obviously they're a good side and have a bit of spirit about them if they could be 32-6 down going into the last quarter, and score three tries to earn themselves a bonus point.
They're now in the same boat as ourselves. Two teams facing into a must-win. Their competition could be over on Sunday; so could ours.
Like I said, it's going to be a test of our character as individuals and as a team.
(In an interview with Gerry Thornley. Trevor Brennan's Toulouse diary can also be read on the ERC website: www.ercrugby.com)
