Division One/Dublin 1-10 Offaly 3-2: So the gong for best original screenplay has yet to be won by a National League game but Saturday Night in Donnycarney came mighty close.
Consider the jagged, twisting plot of this one. Two weakened teams are shooting it out under the bright lights except, well here's the rub, one of them can't shoot. Fish in a barrel wouldn't even flinch if they saw Offaly loading a six shooter above the rim. Barn doors would go unscathed. If you are ever condemned to execution by firing squad request Offaly men do the shooting.
Anyway, back to the big picture. We get to the final reel and these poor tumbleweeds who can't shoot are all peppered with holes and just about to make a dying speech blaming society for what bad turns it done them when bang, bang, bang, they get off three slugs to the gut. Right now nobody looks too healthy.
Why didn't Ciarán McManus just score three goals in five minutes a little earlier in the game? What, if anything, does it all mean? Can either team expect a long life when the sun begins to shine? The viewer is left to ponder these existential questions.
"Yeah, it looked for a while there like it was going to be horrendous" said Kevin Kilmurray of his Offaly side's achievement in getting close to 9pm without registering a score. "But I'm proud of a typical Offaly fightback.
"Quite enjoyable for 60 minutes" said Pillar Caffrey "For ten minutes we looked brutal but there were a lot of good performances out there. One of those things. Football. Crazy game. Once they got one goal they were capable of getting a second one. There's no one answer for it. Maybe we were waiting for the whistle."
Offaly are a better team then they allowed themselves to be on Saturday and, as Kilmurray noted, might have had two more goals. At times, as Dublin splashed the passes around, one suspected heavy-legged Offaly must be coming off a gruelling month of heavy training. They were slower to the ball all evening except, bizarrely in the last 10 minutes when McManus's freakish hat-trick tilted the game in a whole new direction.
Unbelievably the game went to the wire. Offaly's first point which came in the final quarter reduced the gap to 11 points. In the end just two points behind and with a '45' Offaly came close to snatching it. Dublin were shaken. But the absences of Alan Brogan, CiaráWhelan and Bryan Cullen had forced the wise men to delve further into their panel than they might have liked.
Caffrey must be quietly pleased with the options he now has from numbers eight to 15. Jason Sherlock's thoughtful passing from centre forward and the strength and running of Conal Keaney and Declan Lally in the wing forward spots were plus points.
There were times when David "Dotsie" O'Callaghan looked revelatory at corner forward. Tomás Quinn grows stronger and more confident. If Kevin Bonner continues to develop as a viable full forward and Denis Bastic continues to push for a midfield spot Dublin can enter this summer looking stronger than they finished last summer.
The bad news? A return of just three points after the break was a criminal waste of possession by Dublin. Mark Vaughan's potential continues to be clouded by his tendency to get involved in distracting pantomime.
Dublin's defence at times looked as if they had just been introduced to each other and to Gaelic football.
That's about it. Detailed description of passages of play from this odd game carry too many caveats to be worthwhile to the reader. Both sides can do better. And will.
DUBLIN: S Cluxton; P Griffin, B Cahill, D Henry; P Casey, C Goggins, P Andrews; D Bastick, D Magee (0-1); D Lally (0-1), J Sherlock, C Keaney (1-3, one free); D O'Callaghan (0-3), S Ryan, T Quinn (0-2, one 45). Subs: M Vaughan for Quinn (52 mins), G O'Meara for Keaney (61 mins), R McConnell for Bastick (62 mins), D Murray for Goggins (64 mins).
OFFALY: P Kelly; K Lynam, S Casey, N Grennan; B Mooney, S Brady, K Slattery; N Coughlan, A McNamee; J Reynolds, C McManus (3-0), L Mooney; J Coughlan, P Kelleghan, N McNamee. Subs: T Deehan (0-1) for Coughlan (21 mins), R Connor for Mooney (33 mins), P McConway for Brady (49 mins), G Rafferty for Lynam (55 mins), C Quinn 0-1 for Kelleghan (55 mins).
Referee: M Monahan (Kildare).
