Qatar is a joke choice by a bunch of jokers

SOCCER ANGLES:English football is too strong, too rooted in the fabric of the nation to be eroded by Fifa's farcical and possibly corrupt process, writes MICHAEL WALKER

“FICK FUFA”. The two words in thick black type were on a yellow poster attached to a telephone pole outside Ellis Park stadium in downtown Johannesburg.

It was a striking display not simply because of the colours but because it was there at all. We were getting off a bus just outside one of Fifa’s many cordons on the way to a World Cup match in South Africa, a tournament that was sold on the basis of inclusion but which actually was as much about exclusion and control.

Showing a pass or a ticket in order to get through a security barrier is one thing, and a consequence of the world in which we live, but Fifa’s grip goes beyond that. They make sure it does – from their base in Switzerland, whose motto someone said is: “Tax evasion”.

Across the road from Ellis Park was and is a large food market. It was the sort of place where the visitor to South Africa might encounter the real Johannesburg, meet real locals, see a bit.

Every time we went there for either a match or a press conference that food market was closed. If you wanted food, you bought it inside Fifa’s perimeter, you bought Fifa’s food. You went to a “McCafe” or whatever they’re called as McDonald’s, naturally, sponsor Fifa.

That is all part of how Fifa generate tax-free revenue. From across the divide policed by armed police, locals looked on. Like all the stadia in South Africa, Ellis Park was not always full. Tax-payer locals had been priced out. The initial heartfelt and understandable enthusiasm for the World Cup, and the gratitude felt towards Fifa for bringing the globe’s greatest event to Africa, ebbed after a couple of weeks seeing how it all worked. That was when FICK FUFA and others displays of dissidence began to emerge.

It did not wipe away the happiness many South Africans felt, it just added a dimension some had not expected. They were encountering a controlled tournament, what security types like to call a “sterile area”. You started to hear officials, managers and others talking about “The Fifa World Cup”, not just “the World Cup” we all thought we knew and loved. “Fifa World Cup” is a trademark, don’t forget, a sign of ownership.

These thoughts returned on Thursday afternoon when the announcement of the venues of the 2018 and 2022 World Cups was made in Zurich.

When Fifa awarded 2018 to Russia, it was a blow to England – and to Holland/Belgium and Spain/Portugal – but it was one from which English football will recover. It is too strong, too rooted in the fabric of the nation to be eroded by Fifa’s farcical and possibly corrupt process.

The farce involved was that if Fifa wish to expand into countries that have never staged the finals before – a laudable aim in theory – then why not let everyone know beforehand?

Fifa would have saved themselves from those pesky English journalists. We would not have had to endure proposals and all that legacy talk. It would have saved a lot of time and effort, though of course it would have meant Sepp Blatter was not quite as high profile as he has been these past few years. And we can’t have Sepp going under the radar, can we?

But, the World Cup going to Russia? Fair enough. Due to Wikileaks it’s not been a great week for Vladimir Putin and the oligarchs who have glided to big houses in Kensington on the break-up of the Soviet Union. (But then had Wikileaks been around a few centuries ago when Lord and Lady This were dividing up England, Scotland, Wales and, oh yes, Ireland, then there might have been a bit more perspective on Russian corruption on Thursday.)

Courtesy of Fifa this was changed. Russia will stage the 2018 finals and it might take the return of Lenin himself for a FICK FUFA poster to go up near Red Square. Similarly, four years later, if they can find a telephone pole in the sand around Doha, it would be a brave man who shows some dissent. Because, truly unbelievably, the 2022 World Cup will be in Qatar.

Again the Fifa idea is about reaching “new lands”, expanding the game and that in itself is fine. But if the Middle East region was to be targeted then why not encourage a country there with a previous interest in the game to bid? What is wrong with Egypt? It seems safe to assume Palestine could do with some inward global investment. Australia, a country with a sporting history and facilities, and which has never staged a World Cup, was destroyed in Fifa’s voting process. Australians were stunned.

No one laughed yet Qatar is a joke choice by a bunch of jokers. Those who delivered the Dutch/Belgian bid for 2018 must be particularly aggrieved that Qatar’s planet-heating plans to cool stadia for players to be able to run around for 90 minutes runs directly against the green, 21st century basis of their bid. But there you go.

The one hope that comes from this debacle is that ire and ever-greater focus is turned on Blatter and his fat cohorts. There may be Irish bankers with more credibility this week. May be.

Let us hope that Panorama is right now devising a series on how the game was bought by “Fifa World Cup TM”, then sold to the highest bidder. Dough, ah.

The man in South Africa who came up with that slogan was right.

FICK FUFA.

Beauty and the beast

IT IS a disappointing and inconvenient truth we must face that Barcelona manager Pep Guardiola was one of those prepared to endorse Qatar’s bid for 2022.

This is beauty and the beast stuff for Guardiola, who presumably was roped in on the hope that support for Qatar would be reciprocated with support for Spain/Portugal four years earlier. Zinedine Zidane was another doing that.

But for Guardiola to be supporting Qatar in the week in which he organised the velvet destruction of Real Madrid at the Nou Camp felt wrong.

What Barcelona did in lashing five past Real last Monday night was entrance a city, a country and a continent.

It was a bid in itself.

FAI have nothing to be smug about

THOSE IN Ireland inclined to gloat at England’s FA should have a look at themselves. Not only is there Fifa’s and Sepp Blatter’s reaction to Thierry Henry’s handball to consider – always – there is the FAI’s decision to rename Lansdowne Road after a British insurance company. If you know your history, and all that.