We SHOULD have known, we should have known all along. About half an hour into the tedium at Wembley on Saturday, the man from the Birmingham Post leant across the press box and reminded listeners of a most vital statistic. "Of course," he said, "you know that in the two games between these two this season there was one goal. It was an own goal. And you know that over the 180 minutes Chelsea had two corners and Villa had two shots on target."
Those listening knew they were hearing the truth, they just could have done with a little hope at that point.
The voice was right. He forgot, however, to mention that last season Aston Villa had failed to score in their league game with Chelsea at Stamford Bridge, which meant that by five o'clock on Saturday the Chelsea net had been untroubled by Villa players for six hours and 58 minutes, a record stretching back to December 1998.
Add to that the fact that Chelsea finished the season with the Premiership's second tightest defence behind Liverpool's - Villa were third - and the kind of free-scoring, end-to-end epic that the FA Cup and English football needed after the past few weeks was as farfetched a notion as the honest politician. "I don't think it was the most spectacular game," said Gianluca Vialli without irony. Vialli at least had the consolation of seeing Marcel Desailly and Dennis Wise justifying their reputations.
Frank Leboeuf and Didier Deschamps were also committed considering the game was likely to be their last in Chelsea blue, while Roberto Di Matteo scored on possibly his last appearance for the club. While acknowledging the shoddiness and shortage of attacking football - "I think our defence won it, defensively we were almost perfect" - those were reasons enough for Vialli to be cheerful afterwards.
Plus Chelsea won, Vialli's third managerial trophy in England. It gives Chelsea a place in the UEFA Cup and, nearly as important, gets them out of having to compete in the Intertoto Cup in mid-July.
For Vialli it will also mean a less fretful summer. His chairman, Ken Bates, shouted his loyalty on Saturday morning, but another tangible achievement is always welcome.
"It helps me a lot in terms of credibility," Vialli said in a concrete bunker beneath the Villa end. "I'm a young, inexperienced manager and I need to be able to show that what I say and do is the right thing. I need to get the others to follow and support me."
How certain of his players perceive Chelsea dominated the build-up to the final. Vialli's statement at Old Trafford four weeks ago that he only wanted those who are prepared "to die for the club" to remain was interpreted by some inside the dressing-room as an invitation to leave. Vialli's opinion seems to have cooled now.
"I want whoever's happy to stay," he said. "If someone's not happy, then they should go. Sometimes I am too demanding. I forget that they played 61 matches. I relax sometimes and I think with a clearer mind." So, will the team be broken up?
"No, no, that's wrong. Obviously we have to change the team. But I think without the distraction of the Champions' League we can get closer in the Premiership. I have had a meeting with Ken Bates and we came to the conclusion that the team is not too bad. It's been a long season. I'm bloody tired."
It has indeed. Chris Sutton was so tired he sat in the stands. Tore Andre Flo sat on the bench. George Weah, once World Footballer of the Year, played like a wooden one. Weah's miss on the hour from Gianfranco Zola's cute cross was wretched. Sutton might have scored that. Thirteen minutes later Roberto Di Matteo came to the rescue.
David James fumbled. Just as he did at Wimbledon. His England jersey has shrunk over the past fortnight following a season when James seemed to be growing into it.
"If that's considered a mistake today, then that's two this season," said John Gregory, James' manager. Gregory went on to mention James in the same breath as Peter Schmeichel. Gregory also said it was a difficult time to think straight.
It was for us all, John. Numbed by a first half of staggering mediocrity, the second began with a relative flurry of activity. Weah's one moment of quality saw a 20-yard shot zoom past James' upright, Wise had a goal disallowed after another James fumble and George Boateng put a volley wide at the other end. It was almost bearable.
Then came Weah's big miss and Di Matteo's big moment. A bit-part player, settling a bit-part final with a bit-part goal. Three minutes later Benito Carbone had the chance to equalise but scuffed his shot. In injury-time Villa threw everyone including James forward. But they could not score. Ed de Goey left having not made a save.
But then we should have known it would be this way.
Aston Villa: James, Delaney, Ehiogu, Southgate, Barry, Wright (Hendrie 88), Boateng, Merson, Taylor (Stone 79), Carbone (Joachim 79), Dublin. Subs Not Used: Samuel, Enckelman. Booked: Barry, Boateng.
Chelsea: de Goey, Melchiot, Desailly, Leboeuf, Babayaro, Poyet, Wise, Deschamps, Di Matteo, Zola (Morris 90), Weah (Flo 88). Subs Not Used: Cudicini, Terry, Harley. Booked: Melchiot, Wise, Poyet. Goal: Di Matteo 73.
Referee: G Poll (Tring).