Who pulls their weight in the home?

Sir, – I couldn't agree more with Jen Hogan when she writes "I'm told I'm lucky because my husband pulls his weight – but why wouldn't he?" (Health+Family, February 19th)

My wife must be very lucky too: I work full time but do the bins; my fair share of the dishes and laundry; I know how to operate the vacuum cleaner and the dishwasher, and do so unprompted; I make the school lunches most days (while she does our three girls’ hair); I know when they have PE; I remember our extended family members’ birthdays and our anniversary; I cook (in fairness, she does most of it); I do the bathrooms; I replace toilet rolls; I remember to bring the passports, and I know when passport renewals are due; I can dress the girls avoiding the most glaring fashion disasters, etc.

She is a lot better at many other things and we share most of the above chores but this is the least I can do. And why wouldn’t I?

I thought in this day and age for a man to pull his weight was more or less the norm in a good relationship in any secular modern society, but reading Jen Hogan’s article confirms I obviously live in a bubble.


We need to address this inequality at home starting at pre-school age by setting good examples for boys (and indeed girls). The danger here is that girls might expect this as the norm from their future partners and could be headed for disappointment.

At least today unmarried partners can move in together before their wedding day so any potential issues can be identified early on. – Yours, etc,


Cabra, Dublin 7.