ALMOST A year on from Garglegate, the worst that happened in Galway was Anthony Lalor's version of The Piano Man. "Let's say he showed no lack of honesty or endeavour," said a witness, with a wince and an Alka Seltzer.
The Taoiseach burnished his Duracell bunny credentials by gladhanding till about 1.30am, no pint in hand or visible drink around his person. Keeping himself safe for Morning Ireland.
Too safe, grumbled a few who tuned in, too waffly. But hey, since the gold standard of morning-after interviews is Brian Cowen’s fateful bout of September hoarseness, it’s no biggie.
As one sporting gent kindly explained: “It’s like Ireland getting the nil-all draw against Russia . They didn’t light up the pitch but they didn’t f**k up either.”
By that measure it was win-win. The sing-song was relatively orderly – up to the Poc ar Buile fiasco anyway. No one fell over or generated a tweet storm and most made it down, fairly lively, for the 9am session on child protection policy.
Will there ever be such glad, confident mornings again? Since the tone of the think-in basically was to send the newbies back to their constituencies fully armed and in the brace position, there might have been a touch of the Duchess of Richmond’s ball before Waterloo about it.
But in fairness, there was realism amid the ebullience. The shock of the Waterford job losses restored the balance.
They took their leave laden with boxes of leaflets for the next campaign: Gay Mitchell’s joust at the presidency. Here’s a benign-looking, sort-of-smiling Gay standing tall against a Tricolour and a blue sky with just a few fluffy clouds. With Gay in the Áras, we will be proud at home, respected abroad, says the text.
His speech and election plan – director, Charlie Flanagan – was given prime time on the agenda and by all accounts he knocked them dead.
Simon Harris, no mean speaker himself, reported that Gay even got a standing ovation. Really? “It was a genuinely spontaneous, decent ovation,” he insisted. “He was superb. He spoke without a script for over 20 minutes.” That response seemed widespread and genuine. “I supported Pat Cox for the nomination but I was very inspired by Gay Mitchell today . . . And he’s never lost an election – he’s a campaigner. I had him out in Dún Laoghaire and the people loved him,” said Mary Mitchell O’Connor.
Michael Noonan looked like a man with a lot on his mind, which he has.
But did Gay’s speech make his heart beat that little bit faster? “My heart doesn’t tick so fast anymore but I was responding intellectually to it,” he said sagely.
Intellectually, isn’t that a bit . . ? “Now don’t write that facetiously – it was a genuinely good speech”, he said, teacher-like. “Unless there’s a surprise candidate, he’s in with a real chance. So far people aren’t caught up in it . . . But I’m a strong Gay supporter and I’ll be working hard for him.”
It was a very inspiring speech, said James Bannon. He was grinning broadly and it’s entirely possible that James is one of those who isn’t quite caught up in it yet. “Gay will do very, very well in Dublin but he’s not really known outside it and there was a lot of emphasis at the meeting about how he has to get himself outside of Dublin,” he said meaningfully.
Andrew Doyle, a Wicklow farmer in his other incarnation, has no such reservations.
“I’ve never been as confident about a man’s ability to be a candidate.
“If Gay can get his narrative out there, no one will equal him. He is the quintessential Dub but he has rural roots . . . I think people were surprised at how strong he was today.”
Isn’t there a danger he might be a tad bristly?
“He’s a straight talker. He said today he didn’t want any negative talk about other candidates, so there’ll be no bristling. He won’t be the bare-knuckle fighter but he won’t be rolled over either.”
One supporter, looking over at the candidate, kitted out in dazzling white shirt, red tie and sharp, buttoned-up suit, sighed.
“D’you think Gay could look a little bit more comfortable in himself. Is he a bit too trussed up?”
“Yeah. I’m a bit nostalgic for the old Gay waffler,” mused another, reviving treasured memories of Bertie’s “waffler” rage.
And indeed Gay does look a bit grim. It’s possible he has been told not to smile on any account for fear of looking unpresidential.
Close up, he is happy to reprise his manifesto about enterprise and social justice, about rights and responsibilities.
Has the personalised nature of a presidential campaign surprised the famous battler?
He pauses, considers and answers carefully. “There are cyber bullies who won’t engage in discussion or debate but who just want to destroy. I want this to be a civilised debate. . .”
Now where’s the fun in that?