Current approach to domestic violence ‘not working’, conference told

Domestic violence is escaping the attention of the community and of agencies including those in social care and policing and the definition of the offence needs to be expanded to include “coercive control”, experts have told a Dublin seminar.

Dr Evan Stark, who has advised the UK, Scottish and Welsh governments on legislating for the offence of coercive control, said the current approach to domestic violence was "just not working".

He was speaking at a conference organised by Safe Ireland, a national agency working on domestic violence in Ireland.

He said the familiar definition of violence was a “men’s definition of violence”.

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“Women have never equated violence with physical violence only.”

Dr Stark said that in cases that involved the criminal courts, the family courts and the social work system it was like dealing with “three separate planets”.

The same man coming before the criminal courts would often be recognised as “good enough” by the family courts to father his children and was often invisible to social workers.

The most difficult challenge was that police, social workers and even frontline advocates were blaming mothers and blaming women, he said, noting the familiar refrain that women should “just leave him”.

Dr Stark told delegates that between 60 per cent and 85 per cent of domestic violence incidents were repeat incidents.

“You almost never see a one-off,” he said.

“If you wait for a severe injury before you identify domestic violence, then you are going to miss 98 per cent of cases.”

“For many men, abuse is like going to the toilet. It’s a routine that they are in. The issue is power, not physical strength,” he said.

In the most extreme cases of abuse, women would experience “Stockholm Syndrome”, similar to that seen in sexually abused children.

Dr Stark noted some people would question what was being done about female violence against men. He agreed such cases happened but said they were very few in number.

“If you change all of women’s violence against men, what would change? Virtually nothing. If you change all of men’s violence against women, what would change? Virtually everything.”

There was, he said, a link between ending the “abuse agenda” and the equality agenda for women. It was not just about safety, but also about freedom.

Dr Stark said he did not believe the perpetrators were “evil”, but he said men needed to be brought “back into the picture” and held responsible for their actions at every level, through incarceration if necessary, but also through education.

Davina James-Hanman, an author and independent violence against women consultant, spoke of her experience of carrying out domestic homicide reviews in the UK. A formal process for reviewing such cases and how services had responded to the victim commenced in 2011.

Ms James-Hanman said she had learnt a lot from carrying out the reviews and had “a new-found respect for homicide detectives”.

“It’s a much more emotional experience than you think it will be and at the end of the experience, I often feel that I have lost a friend.”

She said reviewing the cases was a “very intimate and very emotional experience” that involved combing through every aspect of the person’s life, including their voice messages and text messages.

Urging those present who worked in the area to handle any such reviews with respect, Ms James-Hanman said values mattered. The reviews had to be conducted “with humility” and not from the defensive position that “we all did our jobs properly”.

Professionals should enter into the process in a spirit of learning and awareness.

Women's Aid may be contacted at 1 800 341900, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. womensaid.ieSafe Ireland also provides information on available supports on its website at safeireland.ie