10 signs that summer is well and truly over

One minute it’s beers on the patio and the next you’re hunting for a bale of briquettes


1. The Rose of Tralee festival is gearing up and will appear on your telly for two days next week. It is enough to give you that sinking feeling that tells you summer is definitely over. The moment you realise the Roses are in town is the moment you get that ultimate "Glenroe feeling".

2. RTÉ announces its new season. Back from their extended holidays, the stars of Montrose send their summer filler-inners back to where they came from. They assemble in front of the gathered media to announce what's new on the box for those dark, gloomy months ahead.

3. The small glimmer of hope that we might just get more than two days in a row of warm sunshine begins to fade and instead the penny drops that it's downhill from here. Jean Byrne is looking gloomier than usual and you yearn for an aul wink from Ger Fleming to make everything alright as the rain bashes against the window. You find yourself putting on a jumper in the evenings and you realise you haven't put your shorts on in a week or two. One thing is for sure: there's not a grand stretch in the evenings any more and it is only a matter of time before somebody remarks how dark it is at 9pm.

4. You decide to light "a small fire"... just for the look of it.

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5. The back-to-school ads are now in full hysterical swing and school uniforms are everywhere in the shops. You go to buy a litre of milk but you must wade through navy v-necked jumpers and small grey slacks first. Cover your kids eyes and ears if you don't want what's left of their summer holidays ruined with thoughts of 12-times tables, interactive white boards and "little lunch".

6. Teachers, when they forget they're talking to a civilian, can be caught bemoaning the fact that summer is over and the rest of us can be heard gritting our teeth. Except politicians. They're still on holidays. Okay, this is a bit of a cheap shot, everybody knows the teachers have been busy, er, marking papers, recovering from the stress of their jobs over the summer and politicians have continued to carry out the very important work of the committees and have been dealing with constituents' issues during June, July and August.

7. People are posting on Facebook about how delighted they are that GBBO is back.

8. Your flip flop strap breaks and when you go to buy a new pair it's wall-to-wall "Autumn / Winter collections". Not a pair of shorts, or a tee-shirt to be had and suncream is now becoming hard to source in Lidl and Aldi. It is on your mind now that you should dig out your winter clothes from the wardrobe/attic.

9. The dog does NOT want to go outside.

10. Only about 130 days until Christmas... sorry.