HOT SPOTHe's heard them all before . . . so bog off. Playwright Eugene O'Brienstands up for the Faithful County - much misunderstood, much-maligned, but mostly much-ignored. He's looking forward to having an Offaly man in charge.
THE FAITHFUL COUNTY - BIFFO, bogger, bog trotter, you're an Offaly nice person . . . I've heard them all over the years when I've answered the question "So where are you from?"
Or people would look at you blankly and try to think of a town in the county or someone famous from Offaly or anything to do with Offaly bar it being a place you drive through to get to Galway or one of the other "glamour" counties. Offaly is not a glamour county, it's included in the "Places I would never visit" Bord Fáilte bargain basement bin along with Longford, Cavan, Laois . . .
In the early 1980s people were glad of Offaly's GAA teams, as if they provided a subject they could mention to you to fill the embarrassing silence. Both sides reached their respective All-Irelands in 1981, the hurlers winning their title for the first time and the footballers losing. But the next year the footballers beat Kerry with the famous Séamus Darby goal that prevented Kerry's historic five-in-a-row. I stood on the Canal End that day and remember the rain and the tears of joy. I remember Edenderry, where I'm from, shut down for the week and the cup coming to the square on the Thursday night. Unemployment was rife, and for those who were working - their wages decimated by high tax - things were gloomy and depressing and the win was a huge boost.
I moved to college and remember people being astonished that anyone from Offaly had heard of The Jesus and Mary Chain, New Order, The Cocteau Twins. Surely we were all into country and western and had no access to anything that approached being hip and groovy? Indeed, I think they were amazed that we had televisions and radios in the bog. But it was good for me because the more I was maligned for where I was from, the more I was proud of it and was not ashamed but pleased. On meeting a new person I would tell them out loud and proud that I was indeed a Big Ignorant F**ker from Offaly.
Things have moved on hugely since then, of course. Symbols of this change in my own town is the town hall, which was a dark depressing looking building, but now has got a complete make-over, and the other symbol is the traffic jams every day of the week.
In the 1980s it was tumbleweed. But recently 3,000 houses have sprung up. They have been joined by a Lidl, Aldi, Tescos, Dunnes. Numerous nationalities have taken up residence - even a load of Dubs! Other parts of the county have been less effected by the commuter belt, and Banagher on the River Shannon always seemed a world away from my own town, with tourists and boats and it's proximity to the glamorous Galway. (A visit to Hough's pub is a must if you are ever there.)
My home county has remained very much in my thoughts, and when I started writing, I set my plays Eden and Savoy and the television series Pure Mule there. Some people might say I paint a bleak picture of the place, but I hope to have portrayed it warts and all and with the kind of fairly black, dry humour and unassuming attitude to things which mirrors the flat bog landscape and accent. I know it's maybe inaccurate to generalise about counties - Cavan people are mean, Cork people verbose, Galway people laid back and cool - but it is fun and sometimes cliches are cliches because they are true. (Especially about Cork people . . . Ah no, only messin'.) So Offaly people don't possess a natural self-confidence or at least they don't show it. They won't be first in the room to give their opinion, they'll wait and mull it over. Much like our incoming Taoiseach. While his humour and intelligence are not always immediately apparent, having met him I can vouch that they are there. So as all eyes shift from Drumcondra to Clara, be upstanding and belt out "A rover I have been and a rover I will stay, and to that faithful county dear I shall return some day, Uíbh Fhailí, how I miss you with your heather scented air, silently the peaceful Brosna calls your sons from far and near."
And just a footnote. While there are mentions of places of interest in Offaly to visit elsewhere in these pages, a hidden gem is Croghan Hill, near the village of Rhode. Saint Brigid was supposed to have been veiled up there. It's about a 25-minute walk up and the view, on a clear day, is spectacular. We shot a scene for the Eden film on the top of it last summer. So check it out. Come on the Faithful!