Condolences, first of all, to all entrants for who yesterday turned out to be more about perspiration than aspiration. The annual best dressed person competition was held at the Kerrygold Horse Show and given the recent spate of appalling weather (see below), it was perfectly understandable that many would-be winners brought along umbrellas and overcoats. The afternoon, however, turned out blisteringly hot, leaving lots of faces red from a mixture of discomfort and sunburn. Coolest competitors by far were the handful of women strolling about the showgrounds under parasols, who were the objects of envious stares from the pack-a-mac brigade left clutching quantities of redundant clothing.
It quickly became clear, as ever, that this occasion had absolutely nothing to do with anything else taking place at the horse show. Vertiginous heels, which would have sunk deep into the arenas' grass, were being worn with skirts so perilously short they would have frightened any horse taking a peek. The stylish and the equestrian are entirely separate - but equally competitive - events at the RDS. In the case of clothes contestants, no one had to step into an arena until the final. Instead, the well-groomed ones gathered around the band lawn where the first prize - a Rover 214i worth £12,000 - was on display. The majority of entrants stuck close to the car, as though it were the last remaining seat in a grown-up version of musical chairs.
Among women, black and white was the most popular combination, topped either with monstrously extravagant concoctions of feathers and net or tiny cloche affairs. A quick vox pop revealed the majority of outfits had originally been bought for a wedding.
Since the competition is now an equal opportunities experience, there were also a few men hovering around hoping to be noticed. Sad to report, with rare exceptions their efforts seemed to extend no further than combining the best suit with a panama.
Through this increasingly dense crush of picture hats and padded shoulders passed the judges, who included designer Miriam Mone, wearing one of her own suits in black wool. She was looking for "someone very chic who stands out from the crowd".
Another member of the judging panel, broadcaster Carrie Crowley, announced she would "love to see someone who has dressed with individual style without spending a fortune or wearing entirely one designer". For the record, she was togged out in a newly-acquired chocolate-brown Mao-collared trouser suit by Dries Van Noten, a Belgian designer not exactly renowned for his modest prices.
MC for the afternoon, Marty Whelan opted for a charcoal and black fine-stripe suit from Louis Copeland. By the time he marshalled the 10 finalists together on stage, a large and predominantly female audience had gathered to see who would be chosen as the most stylish person of the day. Their applause was particularly generous for Carlow farmer John Ryan after he declared he was single; one woman in the crowd immediately offered to bake daily for him. Unfortunately, Mr Ryan's bachelor status failed to make quite such an impression on the judges - but another male finalist, Robert Harkin from Blarney, Co Cork, was awarded second place and received a cheque for £1,000. The winner was mother-of-four Mary Byrne from Templeogue in Dublin, who drove off competition and car alike with a gold and taupe crochet ensemble by Irish designer Lainey Keogh.
