This summer at the cinema promises more of the same – Iron Man, Hulk and Thor return – but look hard enough and you'll find some gems (and plenty of scatological fun), writes DONALD CLARKE
SUMMER LOOMS. What can we expect? Pretty much the same as last year and the year before that. After a dozen references in earlier Marvel films, The Avengers finally grind their way into cinemas. This could be good news (and not just because director Joss Whedon is a smart dude). Perhaps all the sequels will come in one package – Iron Man, Hulk and Thor are all in the gang – and the summer will be free for fresh, original productions. If only.
Spider-Man and Total Recall are both getting a reboot. American Pie returns for more scatological fun. Christopher Nolan delivers another Batman film. Ridley Scott returns to the Alien universe for Prometheus. It is some measure of the familiarity of popular cinema that the Scott film comes across as a rare outbreak of original thinking. Still, there are films worth anticipating. Damsels in Distress, the latest from Whit Stillman, will be with us soon. Seth MacFarlane’s Ted looks hilarious. The Raid is as strong an action film as you could hope to see.
Just don’t hope to get out to the cinema too often in late July or early August. Some sporting event in the UK is scaring away the movies.
APRIL 20th
BREATHING
Oh those jolly Austrians. The latest grim film from that country concerns an ex-convict attempting to rebuild his life.
ELLES
Juliette Binoche stars as a journalist researching a story on prostitution among students.
LOCKOUT
Two Irish directors tackle a story about a prison breakout in space. Guy Pearce makes with the quips.
MARLEY
Kevin Macdonald, director of Touching the Void, offers up a documentary on Bob Marley.
SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN
Lasse Hallström, recidivist adaptor of airport bestsellers, brings us a romantic comedy concerning, well, game fishing in the middle-east.
APRIL 26th
MARVEL AVENGERS ASSEMBLE
Sorry? What’s The Avengers now called? To avoid confusion with an ancient TV series, the much-trailed superhero ensemble piece now contains footnotes in its title.
APRIL 27th
AFRICAN CATS
If you’re the sort of annoying parent who refuses to allow their children to see superhero pictures, take them to this Disney nature doc. Hooray!
ALBERT NOBBS
After some delay, the Oscar-nominated picture starring Glenn Close as a cross-dresser in 19th century Ireland finally hits domestic cinemas.
BEING ELMO
Much-praised documentary about the chap who operates that popular Muppet on Sesame Street.
DAMSELS IN DISTRESS
Whit Stillman is back. The latest from the director of Metropolitan and The Last Days of Disco goes among snooty college students.
THE MONK
An adaptation of Matthew Gregory Lewis’s 18th century Gothic novel starring Vincent Cassel as the religious ascetic who falls into temptation.
MAY 2nd
AMERICAN PIE: REUNION
Hang on. Can American Pie work with older actors? We’re about to find out. It’s nice to see Tara Reid and Mena Suvari getting work.
THE LUCKY ONE
Boo hoo! Boo Hoo! It’s another Nicholas Sparks adaptation starring Zac Efron. There are just so many reasons to cry. Waaah!
MAY 3rd
BEAUTY AND THE BEAST 3D
Huh? You may snort. But the recent reissue of The Lion King was a genuine smash.
GOODBYE FIRST LOVE
French drama detailing the long romance between two predictably pretty young people.
HARI-KIRI: DEATH OF A SAMURAI
Takashi Miike’s period drama was the first ever 3-D film to compete at Cannes. Remake of a 1962 picture.
JUAN OF THE DEAD
Get it? The latest zombie film is set in Havana and reputedly attempts a satire of that country’s regime.
SAFE
Somebody’s had his wife murdered and needs to exact revenge. Who can it be? It’s Jason Statham, of course.
SILENT HOUSE
What ever happened to the folks behind that killer-shark movie Open Water? Apparently they directed this remake of a Uruguayan horror film. Elizabeth Olsen stars.
MAY 11th
CHARLIE CASANOVA
Winner of a big prize at the Galway Film Fleadh, Terry McMahon’s profane drama attempts to get under the skin of post-tiger Ireland.
DARK SHADOWS
Tim Burton escapes his familiar comfort zone to make a creepy sub-Gothic comedy horror starring Johnny Depp. Do I have this right?
FAUST
Aleksandr Sokurov’s treatment of the durable myth won top prize at Venice, but has gone on to divide critics.
HOW I SPENT MY SUMMER VACATION
Hold your breath. Mel Gibson is attempting another comeback. It’s an action movie set in a Mexican prison.
JEFF WHO LIVES AT HOME
Mumblecore maestros Jay and Mark Duplass direct Jason Segel as the titular introvert.
[REC] GENESIS
The Spanish horror cycle continues. That’s right. It’s a prequel.
MAY 18th
2 DAYS IN NEW YORK
Julie Delpy directs Chris Rock – there’s five words you never expected to see in that order. It’s a comedy.
THE DICTATOR
Sacha Baron Cohen plays, erm, a dictator who looks and sounds eerily – and inappropriately – like Col Gadafy.
THE RAID
Already hugely praised Thai action film directed by Welshman Gareth Evans. Nice and violent.
THE SOURCE
Soppy drama about a group of rural women who refuse sex in protest at their husbands’ unwillingness to help with water-gathering duties.
MAY 23rd
WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU’RE EXPECTING
Another effort to mop up the hen-party crowd, Kirk Jones’s film stars Elizabeth Banks as one of several expecting parents.
MAY 25th
MEN IN BLACK 3
What more do we need to say? The second one wasn’t great. But it made a bundle.
MOONRISE KINGDOM
The latest from Wes Anderson looks set to offer the usual assault of quirky comedy. Bruce Willis and Ed Norton are among the cast.
NOW IS GOOD
Dakota Fanning, dying of leukaemia, wants to lose her virginity. Good luck keeping within the bounds of good taste.
JUNE 1st
THE ANGEL’S SHARE
A big hello to the unstoppable Ken Loach. The social-realist’s latest concerns a dad trying to set up his own whiskey distillery.
LOL
Somebody had to eventually make a film with that name. Miley Cyrus is set adrift in the troubling world of social media. 2G2BT!
PROMETHEUS
It was a prequel to Alien. Then it was a film “set in the same universe”. At any rate, pulses are racing as Ridley Scott makes his first science fiction flick in 30 years.
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN
Didn’t like Mirror Mirror? Well, here’s Kristen Stewart (Snow White) and Charlize Theron (wicked queen) in a version of the same story.
THE TURIN HORSE
The latest from Béla Tarr, Hungarian master of slow cinema, clocks in at a modest 146 minutes. It’s about the “heaviness of human existence”. Of course it is.
JUNE 6th
RED TAILS
George Lucas produces a film about African-American fighter pilots in the second World War.
JUNE 8th
CASA DE MI PADRE
Will Ferrell stars in a broad attempt to parody the Mexican telenovela. Sounds amusing.
A FANTASTIC FEAR OF EVERYTHING
Simon Pegg turns out for a British comedy co-directed by Crispian Mills. Yes, he’s the son of Hayley and grandson of John, and he was once in Kula Shaker.
THE INNKEEPERS
Kelly McGillis emerges from obscurity to star in a horror film set in, yes, a possessed guest lodge.
WOODY ALLEN: A DOCUMENTARY
What’s this about? Robert Weide, best known for directing Curb Your Enthusiasm, rounds up the talking heads.
JUNE 15th
FAST GIRLS
Just in time for the Olympics, it’s a drama following British entrants in the Women’s 4x100m Relay.
JACK THE GIANT KILLER
Bryan Singer offers us a fantasy about a farmhand who ends up rescuing a princess from ogres.
POLISSE
The French actor and model Maïwenn stretches out with a film about the child protection unit within the Paris police force.
ROCK OF AGES
It’s Mamma Mia! for poodle-rock aficionados. Well, that’s the idea anyway. Tom Cruise is among those belting out the power ballads.
JUNE 22nd
CHERNOBYL DIARIES
Horror film set in and around the site of the notorious nuclear disaster. Is this really in the best taste?
THE FIVE-YEAR ENGAGEMENT
It’s that Jason Segel again. The amiable comic writes and stars in a comedy about a couple who can’t seem to get round to tying the knot.
LOVELY MOLLY
Eduardo Sánchez, co-creator of The Blair Witch Project, directs a comedy about a woman who encounters supernatural beings in the woods. Don’t stretch yourself, Eduardo.
RED LIGHTS
What’s with all this horror in the middle of summer? Rodrigo Cortés’s picture features Robert De Niro and Cillian Murphy in a tale of dubious psychics.
JUNE 29th
DARK HORSE
The great Todd Solondz unleashes another batch of oddness. Christopher Walken and Mia Farrow are among the weirdos.
FRIENDS WITH KIDS
An ensemble comedy that provides what the title promises. Chris O’Dowd and Megan Fox add, respectively, comic grit and mainstream glamour.
JOYFUL NOISE
Be honest. You’ve always longed to see Queen Latifah and Dolly Parton in the same film. They join forces in a comedy about a small-town choir.
KILLER JOE
Director William Friedkin and writer Tracy Letts reunite after their interesting collaboration on Bug. Matthew McConaughey stars.
JULY 4th
THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN
Is this really necessary? It seems only minutes ago that Sam Raimi successfully brought the web-slinger to the screen. The project has, nonetheless, been rebooted with Andrew Garfield.
JULY 13th
ICE AGE: CONTINENTAL DRIFT
The last film in the so-so animated series was spectacularly successful outside the United States. In other words, we only have ourselves to blame.
MAGIC MIKE
One never knows what to expect from Steven Soderbergh. The director’s latest features Channing Tatum as a male stripper. Oo, missus!
NOSTALGIA FOR THE LIGHT
Patricio Guzmán’s peculiar documentary combines astronomy with meditations on the aftermath of Pinochet’s regime in Chile.
JULY 20th
THE DARK KNIGHT RISES
Can Christopher Nolan follow up on the enormous success of The Dark Knight? A billion Batman nerds have their fingers crossed.
REVENGE OF THE ELECTRIC CAR
Chris Paine, director of Whatever Happened to the Electric Car? recommences his investigation into the apparent suppression of a vital technology.
THE THREE STOOGES
The Farrelly brothers and the Stooges – ancient masters of slapstick – sound like a marriage made in heaven. Or somewhere else beginning with “h”.
JULY 27th
DR SEUSS’ THE LORAX
Hold on a moment. Wasn’t this released in the US in the early 17th century? Not quite. A full six months later, our kids get to see the hit animation.
AUGUST 2nd
ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER
The movie business still moves surprisingly slowly. Surely the craze for 19th century figures fighting the undead withered years ago?
AUGUST 3rd
DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: DOG DAYS
The adaptations of Jeff Kinney’s passable kids’ books keep coming our way. The crew are all back on board.
GI JOE: RETALIATION
Oh come on! Did people really go and see the awful GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra? So it seems. They’ve somehow persuaded Bruce Willis to appear in part two.
TED
If you’ve seen the trailer you will already be salivating. Seth MacFarlane, creator of Family Guy, moves into film with a comedy concerning a foul-mouthed, boozy teddy bear.
AUGUST 10th
AI WEIWEI: NEVER SORRY
Documentary on the innovative Chinese artist who is constantly getting up the nose of the authorities.
STEP UP 4 3D
They’ve already made three of these dance things? Expect more boob-thrusting and bumbumping.
AUGUST 17th
THE BOURNE LEGACY
It is and it isn’t a Bourne film (hence “Legacy”). Jeremy Renner is running and jumping, but he’s not actually playing Jason Bourne. Whatever you say…
BRAVE
Can Pixar get back on track after the near-disastrous Cars 2? The studio’s latest animation is set in ancient Scotland.
THE EXPENDABLES 2
The old troopers are back to kick more ass. Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme (perhaps inevitably) join Stallone and the gang.
AUGUST 22nd
TOTAL RECALL
Yes, it’s yet another remake. The inestimable Colin Farrell takes on the role once played by Mr A Schwarzenegger in Philip K Dick’s tale of implanted memory.
AUGUST 24th
KEITH LEMON: THE MOVIE
Keith Lemon? In 2012? Some years after his heyday, Leigh Francis’s sleazy TV character makes it onto the big screen.
WARM BODIES
Well, I suppose the thing about zombies is they refuse to die. The 125th undead drama of this summer alone stars Dave Franco and Nicholas Hoult.
AUGUST 29th
NEIGHBOURHOOD WATCH
Jonah Hill and Ben Stiller are among the suburbanites who encounter (what else?) more than they bargained for while on neighbourhood watch. It involves aliens, apparently.
AUGUST 31st
A FEW BEST MEN
Wait a moment. Olivia Newton-John? All right! ONJ appears in a comedy following three men as they journey to the Australian outback for a wedding.
THE POSSESSION
Horror flick concerning a malevolent spirit that lurks in an antique box. Jeffrey Dean Morgan shudders.
PUSHER
British remake of Nicolas Winding Refn’s cult film concerning drug runners.
