Farnborough unveil unlikely team of galacticos

Entire squad at English non-league club change names by deed poll ahead of new season

Lionel Messi, Diego Maradona and Pele will be among the star attractions at non-league Farnborough when they take on Chelmsford City this Saturday after every player in the first team squad changed their name to a legend of the game - and John Terry.

Not to be undone, the management also got in on the act with Jose Mourinho able to call upon Alex Ferguson and Terry Venables as he considers whether George Best is a better option than Johann Cruyff to cause Chelmsford problems on the left wing this weekend.

Unsurprisingly, the decision to overhaul the squad followed a sponsorship deal with bookmakers Paddy Power, a deal that saved the club from administration.

“Over the summer it looked touch and go whether we’d even start the season,” Mourinho said today. “But now we’ve got by far the greatest team the world has ever seen. Although it’s not all good news, Pelé and Maradona have almost come to blows over who gets to wear the number 10.”

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Farnborough FC squad 2013-14

Goalkeeper
Gordon Banks (Kevin Scriven)

Defenders
Lothar Matthaus (Joshua Huggins)
Roberto Carlos (Oliver Treacher)
Paolo Maldini (Adam Doyle)
Alan Hansen (Alan Inns)
Cafu (Paul Massaquoi)
John Terry (Djibril Fofana)
Franz Beckenbauer (Thomas McGarry)

Midfielders
George Best (Reece Jones)
Paul Gascoigne (Stephen Laidler)
Zinedine Zidane (Merrick James-Lewis)
Johann Cruyff (Tyrone Berry)

Forwards
Lionel Messi (Daniel Bennett)
Gary Lineker (Reece Connolly)
Diego Maradona (David Tarpey)
Pele (Elvis Hammond)

Manager
Jose Mourinho (Spencer Day)

Assistant
Paddy Power (James Dynan)

Coach
Alex Ferguson (Simon Gardener)

Kit man
Terry Venables (Roger Peirce)