On right path: Henry stays on track as he settles into New York way of life

ALL IN THE GAME: A soccer miscellany

THIERRY HENRY, who scored his second MLS goal on Saturday in the Red Bulls' 3-1 win over Colorado Rapids, is, it seems, having a grand time of it in New York, enjoying his new life in the city he says is his favourite in the world.

He has, of course, had to do his bit to promote the game since arriving in the summer, turning up on a few television shows to spread the word. Like Good Day New Yorkon local channel Fox 5.

Greg Kelly: "Thee–airee Henry, you have just joined the New York Red Bulls – that's our soccer team here. Are you psyched?"

Henry: "Eh, yes, I am very happy to be here."

Rosanna Scotto: "So, okay, you just won the World Cup, right?"

Henry: "No, not 'just', I did – but the last one we didn't."

Rosanna: "Oh, okay."

And while Henry fielded these questions his face shared the screen with clips of his career highlights, including, well, that goal in Paris.

The experience, you'd imagine, left him pining for Garth Crooks – well, okay, maybe not – but the positive aspect of being this unrecognised is that he can go about his business in New York fairly untroubled.

And he can even take the train home from games. "It's kind of cool to be able to live normally," he said of the experience.

Mind you, occasionally his face rings a bell. From the MetroFanatic.com messageboard:

Skizee: "Last night Henry and Rafa (Marquez) were on the Path Train after the game. I still can't believe it."

Napoli: "That is awesome! What time was that?"

Skizee: "I think it was like 11 but not sure I was drunk."

“The grass on our training pitch is so high that all the sheep in the Faroes would take a month to eat it.”

– Brian Kerr after the Italians tried to pull the wool over his eyes last week by giving his team a pitch only fit for grazing

Redknapp rethink: 'Arry not happy with drinking habits

February 2008: "They don't even drink, most of them, so the sort of team spirit you could get a few years ago has sort of disappeared. And you do need that team spirit."

– 'Arry Redknapp on the negative influence of non-boozing foreign players on British football culture.

May 2009: "Footballers should dedicate their lives to playing. Footballers should not drink. You shouldnt put diesel in a Ferrari."

– 'Arry Redknapp after Ledley King's arrest outside a London nightclub began turning him off the drink.

September 2010: "Theres one common problem – I've said it all along. Its called drink."

– 'Arry Redknapp, by now a fully fledged pioneer, on the chief reason so many English players are getting in to trouble this weather.

Name game: Zhirkov hint

AS COME-and-get-me pleas go this one possibly tops all. Chelsea's Russian winger Yuri Zhirkov confessed that before joining Chelsea last year he dreamt of playing in Italy. Now he has a daughter and he's called her. . . Milan.

"Now all I have to do is change my son's name to Milan and Berlusconi will finally understand. I am joking, but all over the internet it will say that Zhirkov wants to go to AC Milan."

Possibly.

Next week: Arsenal skipper Cesc names his baby "Barcelona Camp Nou Catalonia I Love Pep Guardiola Fabregas".

*"I'm the only person in the country who's got a phone without a camera on it."

– Yep, Harry Redknapp, you are.

€9m

That's how much Zlatan Ibrahimovic earns a year at AC Milan, making him the highest paid player in Italy, according to figures published last week by Gazzetta dello Sport.

Word of mouth: Gibson may have some explaining to do

"I am struck by Ibra's power and the fact he has very refined feet, considering they are so big. He really looks like a Brazilian."

– Pato on new AC Milan team-mate, Zlatan Ibrahimovic. Alas, his feet were a bit unrefined on Saturday when he missed a penalty on his debut.

"I apologise unreservedly to our visitors for the crass reaction to their anthem."

– George Peat, head of the Scottish FA, after Liechtenstein's tune was jeered at Hampden Park.

"Out of our new signings Victor Obinna didn't have international clearance, Thomas Hitzlsperger was injured, Winston Reid has a torn muscle in his buttocks, Tal Ben Haim was not fully fit and Pablo Barrera was knackered after playing two full games in the week after the World Cup."

– West Ham's David Sullivan.

"If he's trying to say I should move somewhere like Stoke City and change my game to winning tackles and not winning games, then he's having a laugh."

– Darron Gibson on Giovanni Trapattoni's advice he leave Man Utd for regular first team football. Went down well with Glenn Whelan?

Word of mouth: Ancelotti proud of his rear end

"Only once in my life have I felt like I needed a psychiatrist . . . I was looking at Yuri Zhirkov and all I could see was a rib-eye steak."

– Carlo "Cannibal" Ancelotti in his wacky autobiography.

"There are times when I stand up in front of a full-length mirror and act like a contortionist. I twist my neck and I stare at my ass. My fat butt cheeks aren't a particularly edifying spectacle but . . . over time it's taught me a lesson: my ass is earthquake-proof."

– Ancelotti on his rear end.

"I know our love intrigues people, but we fit: I am a diva, and he is a footballer. He is a beauty, too!"

– Actress Brenda Asnicar (18) on her affection for, eh, hunky Carlos Tevez.

"I'm tired. I'm 26. I'm old. I don't know if I will make it to 2014."

– Tevez is running out of steam.

"Basically, you've got to start somewhere."

– John Hartson on why he should be made Wales coach.

Toffee taunt

IF THERE'S any truth to yesterday's reports about what reception was planned for Wayne Rooney at Goodison Park it's a very good thing the fella didn't turn up.

The Observer: "Everton's fans prepared meticulously for the homecoming, buying a blow-up doll to pass across the stands and penning a new chant – 'No woman, no Kai' – to the old Bob Marley number."

Life after football: Kerr old boy Burns tuning up

ENGLAND OLD boys Stuart Pearce, Teddy Sheringham, Les Ferdinand and Des Walker turned their hands to a bit of acting recently (and we're using the word very loosely) when they appeared in a video for the new single by The Establishment.

It wasn't the first time the footballing world did its bit to help the band on its way; the English Professional Footballers Association funded the making of their debut EP in 2008 as part of their programme to help former players start a second career.

And who is the former player? None other than a member of Brian Kerr's bronze-winning squad from the 1997 World Youth Cup, Dubliner John Burns.

Burns, now 32, joined Nottingham Forest from Belvedere in 1994, and his career took him on to Bristol City, Shelbourne, Carlisle United and Burton Albion, before a spell in non-league football. But by 27 his professional career was over.

Now he is trying to make his way in music. Be That Wayis released on September 27th, and you can have a look at the video on theestablishmentband.com.

Mario's world: That's rich

THERE WAS a fine yarn doing the rounds last week about that crash involving Manchester City's new signing Mario Balotelli, when his Audi R8 collided with the car of a fella who happened to be a City season ticket-holder for the last 25 years.

Upon arriving at the scene, the story goes, the police breathalysed Balotelli – it was negative – and then questioned him about the incident.

At this point they noticed a large wad of cash sticking out of his back pocket. How much? Just the £5,000.

The police, it would seem, failed to recognise the fella because they asked him how a 20-year-old could have that amount of cash on him.

His reply? "Because I am rich." Well, they did ask.