Michelle's making a bags of looper relationships

George Kimball America at LargeMichelle Wie seems to go through caddies the way other 16-year-olds change boyfriends.

The precocious Hawaiian finished 26th in last weekend's Women's British Open, a disappointing result abetted in no small part by the two-stroke penalty she incurred for grounding her club in a bunker during Friday's second round.

A day after the tournament concluded, she dismissed caddie Greg Johnston, implicitly suggesting that her latest brush with the Rules of Golf should somehow have fallen within the purview of the looper and not the player.

Wie had just saved par on the final two holes in Friday's round when she arrived at the scorer's cabin and was informed she had been docked two strokes for having in the course of her backswing made contact with a piece of moss which lay behind her ball in the bunker. Exactly how this was supposed to have been Johnston's fault remains unlearned, but by Monday he had joined the ever-expanding ranks of what isn't exactly the most exclusive club on earth - the one made up of former Michelle Wie caddies.

Wie, a strapping six-footer who can outplay most women and outdrive many men, has been playing golf since the age of four, but by her admission hasn't devoted much time to studying the rule book.

"It's not exactly great reading material," she said after her latest transgression.

In her first professional event last autumn, Wie thought she had finished in fourth place and earned $53,000 in the Samsung World Championship, but she was subsequently disqualified for having signed a wrong scorecard after it was demonstrated that she had taken an illegal drop. (The principal controversy emanating from that occasion stemmed from the fact she was ratted out not by another player, but by a journalist, Sports Illustrated's Michael Bamberger, who had been following her group and reported the infraction.)

Three years ago, at the US Women's Open at Pumpkin Ridge, Wie got into several caddie-related beefs with her playing partner, Danielle Ammaccapane. One came when both the 13-year-old player and her caddie walked in the extended line of Ammaccapane's putt. Another occurred when the teenager impetuously hit out of turn, incurring the displeasure of both her opponent and USGA officials on the scene.

At the conclusion of that round, her caddie recused himself in the hope that "this sort of unpleasant incident will not happen again". "I don't want to cause Michelle problems," University of Hawaii professor BJ Wie said to explain his decision to relinquish his daughter's bag.

Later in that same round, incidentally, Prof Wie had accused Ammaccapane of "brushing up against" Michelle (a charge he subsequently withdrew), and engaged in a heated exchange with Ammaccapane's father, Ralph, on the course. (Danielle and Michelle had their own noisy confrontation at the scorer's cabin.)

BJ was replaced by Michelle's Leadbetter School coach, Gary Gilchrist, for the final round at Pumpkin Ridge.

Michelle subsequently engaged the services of Gary Player's nephew Bobby Verway, an experienced tour caddie, and later had a brief flirtation with Tiger Woods's old looper Mike (Fluff) Cowan before poaching Johnston away from his longtime employer, Julie Inkster, last year.

The 46-year-old Inkster, by the way, finished fourth in the Women's Open last week, earning $77,000 more than Wie did.

There is some irony in that the latest cock-up occurred at Royal Lytham & St Annes, the scene of one of the more memorable player-caddie misunderstandings in the annals of the game.

We refer, of course, to the 2001 British Open, where Ian Woosnam hit his opening tee-shot to within a foot of the cup, only to record a bogey "four" on the hole when it was discovered that he had begun the round with 15 clubs in his bag.

On that occasion, Woosnam, quite properly, did blame his caddie, the unfortunate Myles Byrne of the Byrne Clan of Bray.

"You had just one bleeping job to do and you couldn't even get that bleeping right," Woosie reminded Byrne.

As they scratch their heads in amazement over Wie's latest indiscretion, not a few American armchair golf fans, accustomed to seeing the game played on manicured, country-club courses, were probably also bewildered as they wondered "Moss? In a bunker?"

"I knew I hit it, but I didn't think it would result in a penalty," said Wie. "I thought if you hit dirt, it would be okay, but I guess I knew the rule wrong."

What, exactly, should Johnston have otherwise done? Was he supposed to remind the 16-year-old player, 'Don't touch that green stuff with your club, boss'? In a terse statement announcing the caddie's termination, Wie's management team amusingly described the divorce as "part of Michelle's maturation process".

Johnston's replacement has yet to be named, but European fans will get a chance to see him embark on his thankless task next month, when Michelle is scheduled to tee it up against the men yet again in the European Masters at Crans-sur-Sierre.