MAGPIE:THIS WEEK'S recommendation on how you might waste 5.03 minutes of the boss's time comes courtesy of anfearmorbeag (who, judging by his YouTube antics, clearly has a lot of time on his hands – and a bit of talent too).
Anyhow. Your man anfearmorbeag has cranked out another ditty, commenting on the current situation – aka the end of the world as we have known it. It’s called I’ve Had Enough.
As Ireland falls apart, goes the promo, many believe only one man can save the country. “Michael O’Leary will rid us of lawyers, Limerick, Fianna Fáil, the Greens and Blanchardstown. As we retch our way through 2009 we must hope that O’Leary will soon make his move. Order, discipline, and super new roads around Mullingar are but some of the delights on offer.”
Here’s the link to fill that 5.03 minutes: http://ie.youtube.com/watch?v=Lc8VigwKJHcfeature=channel_page
A MAN has been arrested in Australia for trying to smuggle two live pigeons into the country – hidden in his pants. The 23-year-old had just landed at Melbourne airport after a flight from Dubai when customs officers stopped him.
They found a container
holding two birds’ eggs in his pocket, and a further search revealed he was wearing tights with two live birds stuffed inside, one in each leg.
Officers also seized a money belt containing plant seeds and undeclared samples of eggplant. “It is important that people declare all animal and plant materials to customs and border protection when they enter Australia,” said a customs man.
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A DUTCH philosophy student with smelly feet has won the right to attend university lectures after a 10-year legal battle. Teunis Tenbrook was thrown out of Erasmus University in Rotterdam after complaints from professors and students that the smell made it impossible to study.
Now, after a lengthy legal battle, a court has ruled that having smelly feet is no excuse to ban a student from a university. The judge said: “Our considered opinion is that the professors and other students will just have to hold their noses and bear it.”
Tenbrook told the court: “Although I could no longer attend lectures I tried to carry on by studying in the library, but then I was banned from the library as well.”
The university will gain one advantage from the ruling: dozens of books Tenbrook had been unable to return because of the ban can now be handed back. The university has announced that instead of banning students with smelly feet, it plans to issue fines to tackle such problems.
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A THIEF who hoped to be flush after drilling his way into a French bank miscalculated and emerged into a toilet. He missed the safe and found himself in a lavatory, where he was arrested.
The 21-year-old broke into a building adjoining a branch of Banque Populaire in Marseilles in the early hours. The man, who came from Belgium, planned to drill his way through to a room housing safe deposit boxes.
Alarms were triggered when he broke through the wall and police caught the man when they arrived on the scene.
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AN INDIAN court has sentenced a 75-year-old doctor to jail for accepting half a dollar as a bribe nearly 25 years ago. India’s federal police caught Balgovind Prasad accepting 25 rupees (51 cent) from a sweeper in 1985 for issuing a fake medical certificate.
The case dragged on for years and Prasad was convicted in 1992 and given a one-year jail term. He was freed on appeal. On Tuesday, a higher court in India’s eastern Bihar state reduced the one-year term to three months, saying the sum involved was too small, but directed the police to take Prasad into custody as he was guilty.
“The case was also dragging and the bribe money was too small, so Prasad thought he would get a reprieve from the court,” prosecution lawyer Vipin Kumar Sinha told reporters after the verdict. “But all the charges has been proved against him.”
Justice in India is often delivered at a glacial pace.