I was talking to an old friend in Belfast the other day. This woman lives in a comfortably mixed, middle class area and has never been active in politics. She was expressing concern about her daughter, who is studying at an English university. She was only thankful, she said, that soon the young woman would return to her college in a calm and beautiful town in the south of England - many, many miles from Belfast.
What had shocked her was the profound effect which Drumcree and the events which followed it had had on her daughter. She was worried that if she stayed in Belfast and there was a repetition of the kind of scenes that had appeared on television she would "go out and do something foolish."
As the immediate fallout from Drumcree is assessed in political and economic terms, it is equally important to recognise the dragon's teeth that have been sown in these weeks of the marching season. Philip McGarry of the Alliance Party wrote a powerful letter to this newspaper recently in which he pointed out that, for all the efforts that have been made to build bridges across the sectarian divide, the two communities in the North remain, in many institutional ways, more segregated than ever.
The real choice facing the people and politicians now, he argued, was whether "to go down the road of further retreat into two sectarian redoubts" or to try, once again, to create a society which accepts and values a range of different traditions.
That choice has suddenly taken on a grim urgency for a new generation. My friend's daughter, for example, always seemed to me to be wonderfully sceptical about the vainglorious pretensions of the extremists on both sides and clearly regarded the tales told of events of 1969 as ancient history. Yet, watching Drumcree and what happened afterward, she was shaking with anger, just as her parents had done over a quarter of a century ago.
In the past couple of weeks I've heard variations of this story, all of them highlighting what the events of recent weeks mean to a new generation. A couple with small children decided to return to Northern Ireland last year when the husband was offered a job, mainly to be near her elderly parents but also because "the quality of life" seemed so much better.
Now, although they are prepared to wait and see what happens over the next few months, they are already talking about returning to the United States. A young man has been offered university places in Belfast and London. Belfast was his first choice. Now he thinks he will go to London because who knows what's going to happen here?"
WHEN the IRA announced its ceasefire two years ago, the emotional reaction of most people over the age of, say, 35, was to hope that it might be possible for their children to have a "normal" life, free from the threat of violence. To journalists like myself it was miracle enough to see the streets of Belfast crowded with late night shoppers, to know that parents no longer had to worry if their teenage children stayed out later than the time they had agreed.
The relief was common to both communities and helped to draw them together. It was accepted that part of the reason for the ceasefire was the simple and understandable desire of paramilitary leaders on both sides, many of whom had spent long terms in prison, that their children would not be doomed to waste so much of their promise and their lives in the same way.
Young people were themselves acutely aware of the need for political and institutional change. I remember vividly a series of late night programmes on Channel Four in which school leavers talked about their hopes for the future. Strongly rooted in their own communities, they were also able to comprehend the fears of the other side.
Although intensely proud of Northern Ireland and hopeful for its future, they were virtually unanimous on one point. If the violence started up again, they would leave. They did not want their children, if and when they had children, to grow up in the dark, stunting shadow of sectarianism.
This is what is at stake now. For some parents the overwhelming fear of a return to the bad old days is dominated by the dread of random violence, of worrying that it may be their child next. For others there is the new anxiety of knowing that a younger generation is now experiencing the same emotions of anger and mistrust which their parents experienced more than 25 years ago.
It is true, as Dick Grogan, our Northern Editor, wrote yesterday, that the IRA and loyalist ceasefires brought about a great swell of hope and that efforts were made to build on this by community leaders at grassroots level. But equally, we cannot ignore the fact that what has happened in these past few weeks has revealed an alarming depth of mutual mistrust on both sides.
SECTARIANISM still wields a powerful influence and it does not seem that any of the churches - let alone the State - has been prepared to deal with it. How else can we explain some of the most vindictive reactions to Drumcree and after Catholic families intimidated from their homes, the organised boycott of Protestant shops and companies?
A letter published in the Omagh based Ulster Herald, and reprinted in the London Independent, urged readers "at least" to boycott "Orange" businesses. "Buy only from Catholic businesses and invest in your own people - the only people who truly want full civil rights and a future for Catholics in these Northern counties." It was signed "General Boycott".
Father Brian Lennon, who has spent many years working for better understanding between the two communities, has warned us not to fall for the gloomy analysis that Northern Ireland is slipping backwards to 1969.
It is important just now, in the wake of Drumcree and the many frustrations of the talks at Stormont, to keep a sense of perspective. We always knew, and must try even harder to remember, that it was going to be a long and difficult business to secure a peaceful settlement in Northern Ireland. We have to be encouraged that Senator George Mitchell has reiterated his belief that the talks process can achieve that objective.
In the timeframe of history it may be that the depressing events of recent weeks will come to seem as but the blink of an eye. That is to take a determinedly long term view which, as someone who has been around this situation for a very long time, is what I should be doing anyway.
Equally, though, we should not forget that young people particularly those who care about such concepts as justice and fair play - are unlikely to see things in this way. They are more likely to react with impatience and anger to what they perceive as attacks on their community. We have to reassure them that change can and will be brought about through the political process.