Men too can get baby blues

Modern man has to juggle the role of traditional provider with "new man" qualities

Modern man has to juggle the role of traditional provider with "new man" qualities. A recent study found that two out of five men suffer from depression following the birth of a new baby. Susan Calnan reports on the increasing stress men face.

Postnatal depression is a condition that is traditionally associated with women only. New research shows, however, that the arrival of a new baby can bring about symptoms of depression in men, similar to postnatal depression (PND) in women. Furthermore, studies indicate that having a partner with PND increases the father's risk of developing similar depressive symptoms from 3 per cent to 7 per cent.

In the latest study into male PND, conducted by a UK-based consultant nurse, Mary Alabaster, who specialises in perinatal mental health, it was found that two out of every five men suffer from depression following the birth of a new baby.

The report concluded that many new fathers are in need of support and advice and that the issue of male PND is a dangerously neglected area.

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Based on this latest research and growing evidence that there is a "psychological equivalent" of PND in men, the National Health Service (NHS) in Britain has set up a new helpline and support group for fathers suffering from postnatal depression.

The pilot scheme, known as the Fathers Matter project, was set up in March and is being run by the South Essex Partnership NHS Trust.

Co-ordinator of the Fathers Matter helpline and author of the latest report on male PND, Alabaster says that she hopes the project will encourage the setting- up of a nationwide counselling network in the UK for male postnatal depression.

"A lot of men still find it hard to talk about emotional issues, such as feelings they might be experiencing after the birth of a new baby," says Albaster.

"Because there are more pressures on men today to take an active role in childcare, to change nappies, to get up in the middle of the night and feed the baby and still go out to work, many fathers can feel overwhelmed by the experience of fatherhood. But they feel they can't discuss these feelings with anyone else."

As someone who works directly with young families, Albaster, also a counsellor and psychotherapist, says that it is vital that the mental health of new fathers is addressed.

"In Ireland, in particular, the comparatively high suicide rates amongst younger men are very worrying.

"Also, we know from research that children whose parents have mental health problems can go on to have mental health problems themselves," she says.

"Rather than pouring resources into crisis services, the Government needs to start at the bottom end and begin by looking at the mental health of young families and this includes the fathers of those families."

Studies show that more relationships break down in the first year following the birth of a baby than at any other stage in a couple's relationship.

According to senior midwife at the Coombe Hospital, Denise Lawler, who conducted a recent study on PND in women, the transition to parenthood can be an extremely disruptive time for mothers and fathers. In her study, which examined "women's lived experience of postnatal depression", Lawler found that the over-riding emotion in women with PND is the sense of loss.

"Even though after the birthing process, women have gained something, that is their new baby, there is an irony there that women can also experience an enormous sense of loss: the loss of their own sense of self, loss of control and loss of independence," she says.

Just as women experience a sense of loss after the arrival of a new baby, Lawler says that men can also find it difficult to cope.

"There is this preconception in society that men are there to be strong and supportive and that they should always be able to cope. So, when they find that they're not coping, they tend to see this as failure and instead of seeking solutions, they try instead to suppress their emotions," Lawyer adds.

"Also if a man's partner is depressed after the birth of their baby, he can find it difficult to deal with his partner's depression and may find that it is affecting his own behaviour and ability to cope."

Following her own research and experience in this area, Lawler insists that a national strategy is needed in Ireland, to address the issue of PND in both men and women.

She adds that the issue of male PND also needs to be acknowledged in the Republic.

"Paternal health is important for the man's partner, for his baby and for his own development. Men who are experiencing symptoms of PND need to be identified if the onset of depression is to be prevented. To ignore these feelings and soldier on is not enough. Instead, recovery will be quicker if men acknowledge the problem and actively seek a solution," Lawler says.

Addressing the mental well-being of men is a key focus for the Men's Health Forum in Ireland (MHFI), an all-island, voluntary network whose aim is to enhance the health of men in Ireland.

In a new seminal report, Men's Health in Ireland, launched earlier this year, the MHFI found that the issue of men and health do not sit comfortably together.

The report concluded that not only is the area of men's health totally under-researched, but also that men are reluctant users of primary care services and often present too late for effective treatments to be delivered.

It also highlighted a number of worrying statistics: that men die, on average, six years younger than women do, that they take more risks with their health and that they are four times more likely than women to die from suicide.

"In a sense, being male is bad for your health because men don't tend to actively look after their health," says spokesman for MHFI and co-ordinator of The Men's Project, Colin Fowler.

"Irish men in particular still tend to adhere to the macho culture where you can't show your feelings, where you have to be strong and tough at all times. The overall message that we would like to give is that men need greater encouragement to come forward and seek treatment early on if they have a health problem," Fowler says.

He adds that initiatives such as the Fathers Matter helpline and the recent research into the problem of male PND represent a more positive chapter in men's health.

"Fatherhood can be a particularly stressful time for men; not only are they faced with the new pressures of parenthood but also the anxiety over whether or not they will be a good enough father," Fowler adds.

"The Men's Health Forum in Ireland welcomes this new initiative and the fact that male PND is being acknowledged; moving forward we would like to see a similar initiative set up in Ireland, as well as research being conducted into Irish men's experience of PND," he says.

Thirty-three year-old Stephen, who recently became a father for the first time, agrees that fatherhood is a stressful time for men and that a national support service is needed.

Sleepless nights, having less time for work, the unfamiliar jargon associated with a new baby and having less time on his own with his partner and to socialise can create tensions in a relationship, as well as leaving mum and dad tired and irritable, he says.

He also points to the fact that in many households today, both parents are working and this, he says, can create added pressures.

"Because both partners are working, fathers today have to be much more hands-on when it comes to childcare, in order for the family dynamic to work properly," he says.

"Subconsciously you tend to look back on your own parents for a frame of reference but because things were so different then and more women stayed in the home, you can't compare your situation with that of your parents; this creates further tensions because there are different expectations on fathers today and you are in a sense breaking new ground, so it's all very new and sometimes a bit overwhelming."

Dealing with a partner's "baby blues" can also be difficult for men, Stephen adds.

"If there's an atmosphere of depression in a household, this automatically filters through to your own mood," he says.

"And there's nothing more debilitating than dealing with a partner's depression because it's one situation where a quick-fix, practical solution rarely works; it takes time, patience and a lot of understanding.

"The most important thing is being able to sit down and discuss your feelings with your partner; it's all about co-operation, compromise and thinking not only of the child but also of each other."

Warning Signs

• Inability to sleep

• Loss of appetite

• Turning to drink to "cope" with pressures of fatherhood

• Lack of concentration at work and inability to carry out normal daily tasks

• Feelings of being "out of control"

• Having extra-marital affairs

• Erratic mood swings over prolonged period of time

• Violent behaviour

• Feelings of isolation and prolonged bouts of depression

For support, contact Parentline on 1890 927 277. For further information on the Fathers Matter helpline, telephone 0044 1268 564 065.