The Ticket's Come Dine With Us Xmas special

Funnyman Bernard O'Shea, little xs for eyes, What Richard Did star Sam Keeley and Ham Sandwich concoct a weird but strangely satisying Christmas dinner. So wrong, but so right. OISIN DAVISand AOIFE MCELWAINof The Ticket's foodie columns Booking the Cooks and Movie Bites do the sarky voiceover

CHRISTMAS traditions are as varied and diverse as the choccies in our selection boxes. Activities can range from chilly dips in the sea, to all-day pyjama fests. One man's mulled wine, is another man's egg nog. Couch commandos will wage war in the It's a Wonderful Life vs Die Hard Battle Royale. And while we may all unite over the pleasures of indulging in all things edible, there are myriad ways that one can bring on the Yuletide-induced food coma.

With such a deep well of potential material to dig into, we decided it would be fun to see what some of our favourite bands, comedians and actors get up to for the holidays and what food and drink they would serve for the all-important Chrimbo dinner feast. Each had to share with us a different dish or beverage so that we could have a complete meal consisting of a cocktail, starter, main and dessert.

A private dining room in a Dublin city-centre restaurant was booked, so that we could assemble and inspire our crack team of festive merry makers. Over a few glasses of fizz, comedian Bernard O'Shea, actor Sam Keeley and indie pop acts Ham Sandwich and little xs for eyes chatted about all things Christmassy.

Perhaps it was the corny jumpers and party hats, or maybe the aforementioned bubbly, but there was definite lunacy in that gathering. When not wrapping themselves in fairy lights, there were in depth discussions had about DIY novelty under garments made entirely out of household items. Other incidents and chats went down which ought to remain unpublicised, but to be fair to all involved, the best bits from that session were indeed the recipes. Here they are in all their glory, everything you need for an alternative Christmas blowout.

MICHELLE, LITTLE XS FOR EYES

Little xs for eyes deliver deceptively sweet harmony-soaked, indie pop with a thoughtful undercurrent of storytelling. Their tasty debut album S.A.D. is available on littlexsforeyes.bandcamp.com. They played their final show of the year last week at the Queen Herod EP launch in Whelan's.

What is your earliest Christmas memory?We have a huge family gathering every Christmas with all my extended family, where we spend the night singing till 5am. My earliest memory is my dad making me sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star in front of about 40 people!

What is your favourite friend Christmas tradition?Meeting in my local pub on Christmas Eve where we get to meet my mates from home and friends that come home from abroad.

What is the most memorable present you've ever received?My first bike, brand spanking new; I finally had wheels!

What is the most memorable present you've ever given?A knitted stocking full of special presents and tokens.

What is your favourite Christmas song and movie?Another guilty pleasure. Last Christmas by Wham; Trading Places

What do you wear to make Christmas Day extra special?Fairy lights.

LITTLE XS’ TURKEY LEGS BRAISED IN WINE (Serves 6)

Suitable for a smaller Christmas dinner, people with limited oven space, or those who would rather not be still eating turkey into 2013! The slow cooking ensures the meat stays beautifully moist, and there’s always plenty of juice for making good gravy. You can make this with red wine for a better coloured gravy, or maybe try a dry cider.

INGREDIENTS

3 carrots peeled and diced

3 ribs of celery diced

2 large onions diced

Large handful of fresh thyme

Handful of fresh sage leaves

4 cloves of garlic crushed

200g smoked bacon / lardons

3 turkey legs

750ml dry white wine

500ml of good chicken stock

1 teaspoon of allspice berries

Handful of dried apricots

1 tablespoon of red currant jelly

1 tablespoon of salted butter

METHOD

Pre-heat the oven to 150 degrees.Brown the bacon ina large oven proof pot on the hob until crispy. Remove with a slotted spoon to a plate with kitchen towel.

Toss in the onion, carrots and celery. Allow these to sweat gently for about five minutes. Add in the fresh thyme , sage and garlic. Cook for a further two to three minutes.

Set the veg aside. Brown the turkey legs one by one over a medium heat – turn a few times to get a nice colour started on the skin. When you have browned off all the turkey legs return to the pot. Add in the vegetables, bacon, cider, stock, allspice and apricots. Season well and bring to a good strong simmer.

Cover the pot with foil and a lid if your pot has one. You need a good seal, as it will be cooking for a while.

Pop into the oven. Go play with your new toys and enjoy a mince pie.

Cook for two hours uncovering for the last 20 minutes to bring a little colour and reduce the liquid a bit. Remove the turkey and allow to rest. Strain the remaining liquid through a sieve or colander into a smaller saucepan. Put this over a medium/ high heat to reduce it down. It should thicken up as it does this.

Stir through the redcurrant jelly and test for seasoning. Before serving, add a knob of butter to give the gravy a nice glaze. Serve with the carved turkey.

Carving may not be required after such a long slow cook, however, so that’s one less thing to worry about!

SQUASHED SQUASH WITH BACON

INGREDIENTS

1 medium butternut squash

4-5 cloves of garlic, peeled

6 rashers

1 small onion, finely chopped

1 teaspoon thyme leaves

Pinch of nutmeg

1 large knob of butter

Olive oil

Salt and ground black pepper

Fresh parmesan (optional)

METHOD

Peel the squash, slice in half and scoop out the seeds. Chop into small chunks and place in an oven dish with the garlic cloves. Drizzle with olive oil, sprinkle with nutmeg and roast in the oven for 40 mins at 200C. Shake it up a bit halfway through.

Whilst that cooks, grill the rashers until crispy. Crumble into small pieces and gently fry the onion in a little butter or oil until golden.

Once the squash is nice and soft transfer it with the garlic to a bowl, add a big knob of butter, salt and lots of black pepper and mash. Scoop up the mash and top each serving with bacon, onion, a sprinkle of fresh thyme and some parmesan.

ROAST POTATOES

Parboiling before roasting gives the potatoes nice crispy, golden edges and fluffy insides. The unpeeled cloves of garlic can be squeezed out and tossed through the potatoes before serving, they will be sticky and sweet. You could also mash them and stir through the gravy.

METHOD

Half or quarter potatoes depending on size. Boil for eight minutes in well-salted water and drain. Roast with some sliced garlic, a few whole garlic cloves unpeeled, rosemary, salt, pepper, paprika and olive oil, at 200 celsius for 35-40 mins.

BRUSSELS SPROUTS

Dont forget to cut little xs into the bottom of your sprouts before boiling in plenty of salted water.

BERNARD O’SHEA

Having wormed his way into the hearts of many through his baby-in-a-man's-body act on Republic of Telly, O'Shea is a one-stop chuckle machine. Catch him on December 28th in the Mountmellick Theatre, Co Laois, and find him on bernardoshea.ie

Where and with whom do you usually spend Christmas?Half and half in Laois with my family and Limerick with my wife.

What is your earliest Christmas memory?For some reason tasting fizzy drinks for the first time.

What is your favourite family Christmas tradition?Eating.

What is your favourite Christmas tipple?Guinness.

Do you have a Christmas hero (other than Santa , obviously)?People who open shops on Christmas Day and sell milk.

What do you wear to make Christmas Day extra special?Tinsel Foil underpants.

BERNARD’S GUINNESS AND COKE COCKTAIL

INGREDIENTS

100ml Guinness

100ml Coke

METHOD

Fill a cocktail glass with ice. Pour over the Guinness and Coke and mix well. Sup in front of the fire in the comfort of your very own Christmas tinsel foil underpants.

SAM KEELEY

Having gone from working in an XtraVision in his Offaly hometown to playing a part in the Rebecca Daly's Cannes Film Festival-selected The Other Side of Sleep, Sam Keeley has caught up with his peers having had a somewhat late start to acting. This year saw him play Conor Harris in Lenny Abrahamson's What Richard Did. Find out more about Sam on bit.ly/samkeeley

What is your favourite family Christmas tradition?Having champagne on Christmas morning with my folks.

What is your favourite part of Christmas dinner?Bread sauce on turkey.

Who are your favourite Christmas TV chefs?The Hairy Bikers.

What is the most memorable present you've given?A scarf to my dog.

SAM KEELEY’S CHRISTMAS ROCKY ROAD BARS

INGREDIENTS

100g butter, roughly chopped

300g of dark chocolate, broken into squares

3 tablespoons of golden syrup

150g of digestive biscuits, roughly crushed

12 marshmallows, quartered (use scissors)

110g of your favourite Christmas chocolate – Maltesers, Milky Way or Crunchie bars are ace here

METHOD

Gently melt the butter, chocolate and syrup in a pan over a low heat, stirring frequently. When smooth, take it off the heat and cool for about 10 mins.

Stir the biscuits and sweets into the pan until well mixed. Then pour into a 17cm square tin lined with foil. Roughly level the mixture using the back of a spoon. Chill until hard, then cut into bars.

PODGE’S POT ROASTED PARSNIP SHALLOT SOUP (Serves two to four)

INGREDIENTS

2 large chunky parsnips

1 medium/large potato

6 medium sized shallots

5 spring onions

3 large garlic cloves

1 medium to large onion

1 vegetable stock cube

METHOD

Rinse the unpeeled parsnips and potatoes under a cold tap (most of the flavour is in the skins). Cut the root ends off both parsnips then chop both parsnips and potato into inch-sized cubes. Peel and half all the shallots.

Place the chopped parsnips, potato, shallots and garlic onto the tray in a large non-stick roasting tray. Lightly coat in rapeseed (healthier) or extra virgin olive oil and lightly season with crushed black pepper and salt (I used Maldon salt cos I’m a posh git). Put into a pre-heated oven for roughly 30 mins at 200C/180C fan/Gas Mark 6 and roast until all the veg are a nice golden-brown.

Meanwhile, finely dice the onion and spring onion. Heat a small knob of butter and a touch of olive oil over a medium-to-low heat in a large heavy pot (24cm cast-iron pot is ideal). Add the onions and spring onions and gently sweat them for 5 to 10 mins until softened. Season with salt and pepper after the first few minutes.

Now you’re ready to add in the perfectly roasted vegetables. Make sure to squeeze out the garlic from its skin into the pot. Then add roughly 700ml of vegetable stock or until everything is covered with about an inch to spare. Place the lid on the pot and simmer for 20 minutes.

Finally, transfer the soup to a blender and blitz to a consistency that you like. I recommend a light blitz so it’s still fairly thick and lumpy (you won’t notice any potato skins). You can pour the blitzed mixture back into a pot to heat up again if necessary and serve it in oven-warmed bowls for the ultimate winter-warmer soup. Garnish with grated cheese – parmesan or white cheddar.

PODGE, HAM SANDWICH

Ham Sandwich craft delicious indie pop rock and have two albums under their belt. They play The Headfort Arms, Kells on December 23rd and the New Year’s Eve Dublin concert with Imelda May, Bell-X1and The Coronas.

What is your favourite family Christmas tradition? A round of Baileys coffees after my mother’s loaded sherry trifle around a roaring fire. We normally place small bets on things like who will fall asleep first, Mammy or Daddy.

What is your favourite friend Christmas tradition? I’ve religiously gone to Jiffy, Neil and Anithas “The Sokays” house every Christmas Eve after the pub. We’ll normally stay up late drinking, with their parents Jai and Margaret busting some moves in the kitchen.

Any memorable Christmas food fails? One year, we were invited to my sister Paula’s house, but there was a power cut so the turkey was undercooked. So we changed plan and went to my sister Mary’s and her turkey was cremated. My mother found the whole thing hilarious.

What is your favourite part of Christmas dinner? My mothers prawn salad. The turkey with bread sauce and cranberry sauce combo. We always have a delicious trifle too and the best pavalova known to man. I pavalove it.