How to Learn Irish in Seventeen Steps, by Roisín O’Donnell

12 Stories of Christmas - Day 12: A short story from Wild Quiet, Roisín O’Donnell’s debut collection

Step 1: Receive a letter with a fish jumping through a turquoise box in one corner. Unfold heavy blue-lined paper, translate neat black font into Portuguese and laugh. Condicional? They have got to be kidding. A Chara, Ms Luana Paula de Silva, thank you for registering with the Irish Teaching Council. Your registration is: CONDITIONAL. Your conditions are as follows: Irish Language Requirement. Time allowed: THREE YEARS.

During the first two years, you should:

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